oh no! it's Syaza

Happy Birthday, Fazwa Bakri

2011-12-27T04:30:00.000-08:00

this entry is specially dedicated to my dearest Fazwa Bakri.

HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY TO YOU, SWEET PEA!

you are now a few steps away from being an adult. welcome to the club bebeh <3 i want you to know that i miss you so much. sorry for not being there on your birthday. even though you're not here and i am not there, i want you to know that you'll always be my best friend ever. don't ever forget that. you will always have me through ups and downs. i will always got your back. I might have disappoint you through the times we've been friends but from now on, I'll try hard to hold on to my words.

so, again happy birthday,Wawa. stay lovely and stay beautiful. may Allah bless you always.

xoxo

Syaza Kamarudin

looking forward

2011-11-18T12:33:00.000-08:00

okay upgrade sikit. from telur ayam jadi bola tennis. terbaikkk.

anyway, i dont give a damn anymore about the pain. i've got used to it. what i care and excited about is that my baby nephew haiqal is coming tomorroww! ouh yeah! i am not a loner anymore since my brother and sis in law are coming to keep me company during the weekend. and i get to play with haiqal!

told ya

2011-11-17T06:19:00.000-08:00

kan dah kata. it bruises. sebelum tidur, okay mcm tak ada apa-apa. biasa je, bangun tidur, nahhhh besar telur ayam dia bagi. warna merah, purple, hijau dan biruu. artistic kot =.='

I can't even sleep on my left side now. haish.

okay

2011-11-16T08:23:00.000-08:00

quick update;

I fell in the toilet just now. fuck it hurts like hell. I don't even care I just swore. its that bad. gila sakit kot. my elbow and the left side of my ribcage hit the sink and it stings like a bitch.still is. I guarantee you I will have bruises on that both parts. I am so worried. not because I fell, but what will happen if I fell and I couldn't get up. thank God I manage to get up and baring atas katil to ease the pain. you guys knew that I am alone right now in my house. tak ada siapa2 pon kat rumah ni. if in any circumstances I fell and maybe I was paralysed, or unconscious? what if I broke my hand? my leg? or dislocated my neck or what so ever. what if... okay too many scenarios to even imagine. Alhamdulillah i am still okay, even manage to write a post about it. tehee.

what a loner i am

2011-11-14T07:19:00.000-08:00

yes, i'll be home alone for about 2 and a half weeks. why you ask? yeah i know no one asked but im going to tell anyway.

1. my parents went to Makkah performing their Hajj.

2. I am having my semester break right now.

3. my siblings are either working or studying elsewhere which means they can't take care of me.

4. I am doomed.

yeah, i have to cook and clean the house by myself. spoiled brat of me do not agree much with this situation but responsible side of me tells me i'll be okay. no sweat. right? sighh

here i share to you guys how of a good cooker i am. I'll be posting more of the things i cook, well because i have nothing better to do and because i can :)

Dinner: beef cubes in brown sauce, buttered broccoli with carrots and mushrooms, and crispy fries. Lunch: grilled salmon, fries, cheese sausage and buttered broccoli with carrots.

i am officially 19 bebeh!

2011-08-19T03:42:00.000-07:00

August 19, 2011

today is the day I was born 19 years ago, 19th of august 1992. oh how I feel so mature. its been like just yesterday I'm playing with my pink power rangers action figure all day long on my house's porch. and that was like 14 years ago. 14 years okay? if i bred on that year, i'll be having a teenage child! lol. okay but that is when pig can fly.

anyway, i do feel so happy today. this morning, at 1.40am, my house mates surprised me with a birthday cake, which i knew nothing about, obviously. they were so good in hiding the cakes and all the balloons and stuff. seriously you guys can be a very good birthday planner. Love you guys too much.

then, in Madam Jeba class, Language Awareness, she asked someone else if today's her birthday because she wore such a nice outfit. but well, its not. then arfah and gracie...

Arfah and Gracie: its Syaza's birthday!

mdm Jeba: okay, let sing Happy Birthday for her.

(the whole class started singing)

Syaza : :| (oh my god oh my god oh my god. they're singing birthday song for me. oh my god oh my god. saya maluuuuuuu)

(birthday song ended)

Syaza: thank youuuu.. teheeee ^^

i am so excited at that time. i can feel my cheeks burning from the excitement.

i'll post another entry later. tata

:)

2011-08-16T05:46:00.000-07:00

i think im in love, bloggie <3

shh. don't tell anyone. it's between you and me okay?

babbling my life away

2011-07-25T19:03:00.000-07:00

woke up 8am today, the day where you supposed to wake around, hmm i don't know, like 12 in the afternoon! mandi-mandi pakai baju and stuff, keluar hostel alone around 9 with sun blasting on your face, walk all the way to Dewan Senat to see not even a single homo sapien there. do i get the wrong memo? the wrong time? wrong place? i don't know but i am not happy, not mad, just not happy. tell me i am a spoiled whining brat. yeah yeah yeah. i know i am. at least i admit it.

i am in the library now. doing my PTPTN application all by myself without my dad to help me with all the borang thingy. oh how i feel so grown up. i don't like that feeling. can i be a little girl again that everyone spoon fed her? i am still a spoil brat that will get cranky if things didn't go her way.

i am now officially a degree student as well, studying in Selangor University doing my Bachelor Degree in TESL. i still feel like i am not ready. i am barely 19 for f*** sake. i can't do anything without screwing things up at least once. can i actually cope with all of this?

now, at this moment now, that i realize i am alone now. it's me against the world. one to one. so, hello world. i don't think i am your match. so better than screwing my life over, how about you be my best friend and make my life a tad better than before, not that i am complaining about my life currently. anyway, please work with me, world. i know you love me, its a love-hate relationship, i admit that, but i know deep in you galaxy star shit whatever, you love me like how i adore you :)

yes, i have one too.

2011-07-16T09:08:00.000-07:00

i have a tumblr now. it's been ages actually that i wanted to sign up for tumblr but didn't feel like it at those moment. but now i have one yeah me! OKAY i just want to promote my tumblr that is all. sue me if its actually wrong yada yada yada.

my tumblr is foreversyazakama.tumblr.com . click it!

survey murvey

2011-07-11T10:42:00.000-07:00

im in the mood for surveys so, here we go

Shoe Size: 7

Sexual Orientation: straight

Do you Smoke? no, i don't

Do you Drink? no, i don't

Do you Take Drugs? hell no

Age you get mistaken for: no exact number but somewhat older than i actually am :(

Have Tattoos? nope.

Want any tattoos nope

Got any Piercings? yeah, just on both ears

Want any piercings? already got one and one only i ever wanted

Best friend? them <3

Relationship status: single / forever alone

Biggest turn ons: his voice and his smile. oh myyy

Biggest turn offs: no respect for others

Favorite Movie: too many but HP is one of em

I’ll love you if: you give me some moneyyyhhhhhh.

Someone you miss: <3

A fact about your personality: i am an anti-social lunatic who don't know how to communicate with strangers and act creepy around boys i like.

What I hate most about myself: bottom low self-esteem. i need to boost it but my surrounding aren't helping much with my condition.

What I love most about myself: i have traits of personalities that can be soothing to friends around me i guess.

What I want to be when I get older: an educator

My idea of a perfect date: nothing specific. just that both of us can have fun and not being awkward and stuff. lol

My biggest pet peeves: people lick their fingers once they've done eating. i am sorry. i just can't stand it. but i still love KFC and their tagline though.

A reason I’ve lied to a friend: not to hurt their feelings.

What I hate the most about school: the waking up early in the morning.

What my last text message says: got to sleep lovely. good night and tc

A wish that I’ve wished for repeatedly on 11:11: i don't wish on that.

What I find attractive in boys. EZRA MILLER. google him. everything is in him :)

Where I would like to live. England! idk why i just love it there.

One of my insecurities. my body

My childhood career choice. a teacher. wow, i stick to that one for hell of a time, aint i?

My favorite ice cream. good old vanilla!

Who I wish I could be. emma watson. she's the definition of a perfect woman.

Where I want to be right now. no where but here.

The last thing I ate. chipster original

Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately. alex pettyfer. tehee.

A random fact about anything : i am a sucker for sweet things eventhough i can't eat sweet things.

what's that under that pink thing you got there?

2011-07-01T05:36:00.000-07:00

hey, what do you guys think it is?

my new notepad? purse? handbag? pillow? heels? okay jauh menyimpang. tettttt. wrong wrong wrong and yes, wrong.

its myy.. jeng jeng jeng....

yeah bebeh, my new handphone. at last. for a whole month waiting and waiting and waiting, i got my handphone. my samsung galaxy tab p1000. i haven't finish godeh it yet, but what i know, it's worth my penny to buy this gadget.

ouh, and i lovee its cover. its so pink! not what i would always choose but every once in a while, a girl gotta be a girl and pink is not an exception. <3

ambidextrous?

2011-06-23T01:20:00.000-07:00

i am an ambidextrous. i never knew there's scientific name for someone who can use both hands to write or to do stuff. now i know :)

hey guys! i'm ambidextrous! apart from nyctophobic, i am ambidextrous! i just love that name :)

i want my phone

2011-06-07T05:42:00.000-07:00

i still haven't got my samsung galaxy tab yet =.='

when will i get my new phone. when!?

okay that's all.

toodles.

oh yeah! baby.

2011-05-23T23:44:00.000-07:00

well, results came out today. alhamdulillah, it came out better than i expected. not a 4 flat material here. no no no. but enough to make my parents proud :) i disappoint them throughout my previous semesters, first semester and the second, but i think i made them proud a tad bit with my third and last semester of foundation year for B.Ed TESL.

it is all actually because of my dad (sometimes my mum) nagged me day and night. serious. if your dad nags at you because of your studies and stuff, let it be, because in the end, you'll realize all that nagging is what makes you succeed in life, or in your studies, same thing. haha. i kid you not. there's one time my dad was furious at me for not study enough and also because of my suck a** second semester results. then, on my MUET, which i told him i don't think i did well on the test. it's not that i already got the MUET results, but that enough to make my dad gave me a good lecture on my previous mistakes and past for a whole 30 minutes. yes, i cried. haha.

syaza: baba, tadi baru habis my last paper for MUET.

Baba: so, how was it?

syaza: ok lah. not bad but kinda hard on writing part. tak berapa sempat nak habis.

baba: WHAT? macam mana boleh tak sempat? this Muet supposed to be easy for you..................................i don;t know what to say if u didn't get at least band 4............your spm........

yeah, something like that.

but i still love my dad wholeheartedly. i won't be this good of a person if not because of him.

my results,

yeah, those phonology kinda ruin my results, but! i thought i am going to fail my phonology, no kidding! my carry marks is so damn low, i thought there is no chance for me to pass. but hey! C+ is good enough for a-last-minute-study-on-phonetic-transcription-dumbhead like me!

p/s: yeah not gonna tell my cgpa. hahaha

so, babes and dudes, let your dad or mum nags at you, no matter how long or how harsh it is cause that's actually what makes you a person. you kinda want to show to your parents that you're worth every penny they spent on you. take an advice from someone that is a loser and kinda not that intelligent, lazy bum person that kinda did well on her last semester. all with the help of her family. <3

The play that drove myself crazy

2011-05-18T07:17:00.000-07:00

my foundation for B.Ed TESL has ended. now, i am just waiting to enrol for my degree, which might be around this July. in the mean time, i have 2 months to spend. doing what? i have no idea. no idea at all.

i really wanted this holiday because i am too tired, too homesick when im in Unisel. but now, its a different story.

please please please tell me what to do for this whole 2 months. i never had such long holiday since SPM. the most I've had was 3 weeks! and it was a loooonnngggggg break for me. sheesh. it's been only a few days and I am bored to death. talk about hyperbole eh? OKAYYYYYY, no hyperbole, or metaphor, simile etc etc literary devices shit. sorry I just too caught up with literature stuff for the last 3 months. I can't help it.

i think you guys didn't know that I did not eat, I repeat, did not eat for a whole damn week due to stressfulness of the play we had to do for our last semester major assignment. yes, we'd a play. it's the Pearl by John Steinbeck. for those who dispute, why The Pearl? I'll answer you, why not The Pearl? its an interesting story to direct, it's easy, it's laid back, it's good. we had fun doing this play and the most important is, we got full marks for it! hell yeah! the other groups were awesome too! too awesome! Moulin Rouge, Pinochio, The Lion King, and One night with the King, they were good i tell you, no lie.

for our group, The Pearl, the members are ;

DIRECTOR : SYAZA KAMARUDIN

PA SYSTEM : RAMNATH NAIDU

PROPSMEN : SYUHADAH TAMRIN

NAKHOLIJAH

NURANI ATIQAH

KINO : AHMAD ZULFADHLI aka JOI

JUANA : SAFURA

JUAN THOMAS : AMIRAH SHARBUDDIN

APOLONIA : FATIN ATIQAH

DOCTOR : ARFAH ARIFF

SERVANT : HANAN FATIHAH

PRIEST : LOUWENYA

PEARL BUYERS : AIRWYN ERNISYA

SHARIZAN SAM

FAZWA BAKRI

TRACKERS : NURUL AQILAH

SITI ADILA aka LALA

AFFIZA

to those who made this play happened;

without you guys, this play would never be a success. i might not credited you guys enough, but i would like to thank you guys for all your hard work and your sweats. i know i am not a good director, there is or are someone who actually should take my place, whatever it is, thank you so much to make all this happen. this play had made us close, closer than i ever imagine. that play would be the last thing we ever did together as a group, to some of you, and i cherished it the most, i really do. thank you so much. no hard feelings eh? :)

(pictures not in order)

I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH! YOU'RE THE BEST CLASSMATES THAT I COULD EVER ASK FOR. SEE YOU GUYS IN DEGREE!

6 months and forever.

2011-05-17T08:04:00.001-07:00

today i've been experimenting with my shawl, pashmina and all kinds of scarf i bought but never have the oppo to wear it. so, today i browsed into youtube and try every single headpiece i own! YOU KNOW WHAT? i think i'm ready to wear different kind of scarf and different kind of style other than tudung bawal and that black scarf tuh. haha. i am not a risk taker. i play it safe. wear the easiest style i could think of. it's new to me. i started wearing hijab around 6 months ago. not a long time. so, to suddenly ask me to wear those lilit2 bagai hijab. no thank you. but now, i think i am ready! jyeah!

when i am in Unisel, Fazwa Bakri is the one who becomes my tudung consultant. if i want to wear something fancy, i'll ask her to lilit2 it for me. hehe. Now, she's moving to Shah Alam Campus, and i lose one of my best consultant :( she's that good in wearing hijab. she's also one of my bestest room-mate.

her works on me;

next to me, yes, she's Fazwa Bakri

i'll post another entry after this.

i am sorry

2011-04-16T05:55:00.001-07:00

i thought i have changed, for the better that is. well, looks like i am wrong. i never changed. never did. i am a disappointment. i disappoint people. i think i am good at that. :')

:)

2011-03-21T06:32:00.000-07:00

for the millionth time. i am not dead yet. just to keep you updated. uber busy babes. rarely online. rarely blogging, rarely facebooking. sad isnt it. i don't think i will be updating in a short period of time. might take up so time till i next update.

anyway, i'll finish my foundation around may. so, maybe i'll be around by then. don't miss too much

toodles babies.

omg, you are so vain.

2011-03-06T07:13:00.000-08:00

i am feeling like answering survey. you know, when you have those days you feel like doing surveys and nothing else. do you how i feel? you never have those days?

alright fine! actually i am too lazy to update things that i find other simpler alternatives like this. survey. sue me! bla bla bla.

Where is your Mother?in the living room

Where is your Father?same, in the living room

Do you like to swim?i do, but i rarely did

Do you need to return anyones phone call?yes, but im too ignorant to do so. :)

Where were you born?perak darul ridzuan.

Where do you keep your birth certificate?my dad kept it for me. im not sure where.

How many days until your birthday?do you think im a freaking calculator? oh wait, i am. its exactly 166 days till my birthday.

What is the closest orange object to you?my towel.

Have you sneezed in the past hour?nope.

How many books are in your room?plenty, 100++

What did you last eat?subway sandwich

Who is your favorite teacher of all time?well, i have none. they come and go, just like their students.

Name one of your goals for this year?to have no goals to achieve :)

What is the biggest trouble you have ever been in?ouh, i rather not tell.

Did you cry because Michael Jackson died?nope. no reasons to do so.

What does your 9th message on your phone say?"dear miss syaza, esk ada class x?" yes, life of a class rep revolves with this kind of message :)

Look to your left. What's there?wall, pink wall

Ever pop someone else's pimple?nope, i found it gross. haha

How long does it take you to fall asleep?depends on where i sleep.

Are you scared about the end of the world?yes, because i dont think my good deeds are, well, enough.

Is there a TV in the room you are in?nope the closest thing to a tv is my lappy

What are you looking forward to?to finish this damn foundation year for B. Ed TESL.

What comes to your mind when I say red?blood. oozing from your freaking head.

What other language do you want to be fluent in?sadly to say, english.

Do you crack your neck often?nope, i can't do it. too violent for me.

Do you usually hold your pee for a long time?yes, all the time.

Is it possible to lick your elbow?yes, if you have an elasticity of a rubber band

Worst feeling in the world?not being able to taste, imo.

What's your current favorite commercial?none.

Name something you think is pointless?you! haha okay no. bad joke sorry.

Favorite fast food restaurant?Mcdonalds and subway and kfc and a&w

Have you ever been in a fist fight?no, i am a lady. i don't fist fight. uhuk2.

Would you concider yourself as a pyro?a pyro? you mean the comic character? no i do not.

Did you have a weird dream last night?yes, very. but awesome at the same time

Do you wish at 11:11?no, khurafat. i don't want any scary shit bothering me while im sleeping, thank you.

Do surveys really cure boredom?it do not cure boredom but it sure does make time fly fast.

alright, here they are. i am so lazy, i am ashamed of myself. but hey, i know you stalkers like to know about me right? i know you do. even if you dont, just admit it "yes, i do love to read about you, syaza even if it is boring as hell."
awwwwwwwwww, i love you guys! muahh!
xoxo,Syaza Kamarudin

advance warning

2011-02-18T08:41:00.000-08:00

I am so going to post my nephew's picture tomorrow.

why? because i freakin can and because he's too adorable to not to.

so, beware bebeh, you might get an epilepsy from the overload cuteness of Mohd. Haikal bin Muhammad Shiraz!

Living In The Sky With Diamonds

2011-02-14T08:26:00.000-08:00

alright peeps!

i've been tagged by this gorgeous lady, LYN .

actually, i've done this thing once, i think almost a year ago, cannot remember but hey, songs change, answers change, might be fun! :D

thanks lyn for the tag! :)

so, here we go!

put your library music on shuffle.
for each question, press the next button for your answer.
you must write the song title as the answer, as the question, no matter how silly it sounds.
most of the time they seem to work though, strangely enough.
okay go! when you're done tag 20 person in this note, and make sure to tag the person who tag you this.
the answer of number 20 is the title of your note!

1. if someone say "is this okay", you say?
Save you - Simple Plan

(i might need to safe you from that outfit?)

2. how would you describe yourself?
- Summer Hair (forever young) - The Academy Is...

(well no idea. haha)

3. what do you like in a guy/girl?
We Belong Together - Mariah Carey

(he stands up for you no matter what.)

4. what is your life purpose?
weightless - All Time Low

( "maybe its not my weekend but this gonna be my year" . interpret this )

5. what's your motto?
Girls Do What They want - The Maine.

(hah! what a perfect song :)

6. what do your friends think of you?
Cleaning out My Closet - Eminem

(nak kata aku gila lunatic bunuh orang apa?)

7. how do you feel today?

Jizzed In My Pants - The Lonely Island

(oh god, i promise you i am not horny perverted human today.)

8. what do you think of your parents?

Say It Again - Marie Digby

(i love you mama baba! :*)

9. what do you think about very often?
David Guetta - Gettin Over You

(haha. so not what i am thinking.)

10. what is 2+2?
track 1 = Grenade - Bruno Mars

(well, it's the first track. but still 2+2= 1 is still freakin wrong)

11. what do you think of your best friends?
Linkin Park - Somewhere I belong

(well, this song is about being outcast but i do not feel that i think. lets just took the title of the song )

12. what do you think of the person you like?
One Last - Taufik Batisah

(let the song do the talking :)

13. what is your life story?
Jar of Heart - Christina Perri

(not much of my life story. i dont have a love life. thank you)

14. what do you want to be when you grow up?
Baby - Justin Bieber. (okay i thought dah buang lagu neh =.=')
(i want to be a baby to someones willing to have an enormous baby?)

15. what do you think of when you see the person you like?
Just My Luck - Mcfly

(yes, okay bukan senang nak jumpa orang yang kita suka okay? it's all about luck bebeh. )

16. what will you dance at your wedding?
My Only One - Mocca

(okay that would be so cute dancing to this song on my wedding.)

17. what will they play at your funeral?

The Remedy - Jason Mraz

(yeah, you should look for remedy for me when I am alive rather than when i freakin dead)

18. what is your biggest fear?
Dead and Gone - JT and T.I

(yes, to die nothing, not a part of someone's life. )

19. what is your biggest secret?
Against All Odd - Postal Service

(yeah, no)

20. what will you post this as?
Living In The Sky With Diamonds - Cobra Starship

(ouh yeah bebeh!)

TIME TO TAG!!!

- Adilah

- YOU! whoever wants to do it, do it! :)

put me out of misery

2011-02-11T03:15:00.000-08:00

well, I'm Syaza binti Kamarudin live from Institut Jantung Negara.

Why i am here?

It's for me to say nothing and for you to ponder, Love

p/s : what the fuuuuu is happening when hospital's wifi is far greater than wifi in hostel? mindf**k

xoxo,

Syaza Kamarudin

2011-02-04T11:07:00.000-08:00

too many things to expose, too little guts to say.

Yes, you're a babe.

2011-02-04T08:42:00.000-08:00

Soooo, i just realised that i had posted 66 entries throughout the years i've had a blog. not too shaby for a passive blogger. how long has it been? i've made this blog at the end of 2008. which means its been 2 years already. i am so proud of myself that i actually continue blogging for all these while. i am not a person that sticks to one thing. i know, bad of me but that is how i am. so, it is quite an acheivement in having a blog for a full two years and maybe for many years to come.

I said that i would write an entry on the days i went to Kuantan. let's just forget about the days okay? i went there and it was raining the whole freaking damn day! I was stuck in the hotel room for almost 24 hours. the only time i went out was when we, my parents and I was so hungry and went out to grab a bite. other than that, watching tv and doze off. Actually the thing i was eager the most when we went to Kuantan was to buy crabs, red crabs, ketam batu. But due to the rain and it was actually quite far from the place we're staying, my dad said to buy it some other time. bummer :(

okay, the above paragraph was quite long for it to be an untold story to Kuantan. hehe.

Today, i went to watch Green Hornet in 3D. we went to Alamanda as it was the nearest to our house, which took like 10 minutes.i watched it with my sis, bro and sis-in-law. the movie was good. i can tell you that. no regrets watching it and spent RM17 for the 3D movie. Seth Rogen never failed in giving us or atleast me, his not-so-loyal-yet-quite-eager fan a good laugh. Jay Chou is a good actor too even though his English is something that is not to be proud of. I can't even understand half of what he's saying. But i can be dazed by his looks. ehem, (Syaza pervert) The fighting scenes, i can give it 7/10. but the car, damnit you, i'll kill a person for a piece of that metal.

It's all i guess. supposedly,i wanted to post about my sis and bro birthday in this entry, but i think i'll make a new entry for that.

alright then, toodles!

xoxo,

syaza kamarudin

Don't come near Syaza, she might bite.

2011-01-29T08:31:00.000-08:00

guess what bebeh? i've been told that our semester break will be extended for another week! Another freakin week! 7 days! 168 hours! 10080 minutes! 604800 seconds! but on second thought, it's not that much of a day but still seven extra days! how esthatic i am! so, by mean, i'll be back in UNISEL on the 6th of February. Bolehlah, it's better than i have to go back to Uni on the 30th, Monday and then already going back home on Wednesday. Waste of my time and energy that way.

Alright, so nothing much happen. i told my parents my Semester 2 result which is suck, and they took it quite well,more or less. The result actually came out like 3 days ago but i kept holding back in telling them my result in fear they will deffo screaming, yelling, throwing tantrums at me, okay that may be a bit exagerating but you get the idea. But hey, they still screaming but not as bad as i expected. lol. Looks like i worry for a full 3 damn days for nothing.

WHAT? HOW IS MY RESULT? MY CGPA?

well, i can tell you, of course if you wanted to know, but then i have to kill you :)

yeah, it's better if I don't tell you my result. Nothing good came out from me telling you my result, except if you enjoyor indulge in other people's misery that is. And if you do, then you must be a very unstable young lad or better say lunatic you crazy bitch! uhuk uhuk. Better seek help. I have some shrinks that i can recommend to you. I tell you, they're very good. Look how they changed me to howl i am now, (okay maybe i am not the best example) but yes, if you want, PM me. ;) okay dont, im just kidding.

p/s ; i'll be in Kuantan for 2 days, Monday and Tuesday. I might have interesting things to write by then.

Toodles!

xoxo,

Syaza Kamarudin.

hahahahahahahaha

2011-01-25T22:44:00.000-08:00

MY SECOND SEMESTER result is a joke! a joke!

let's laugh together bebeh! serious! i'm like laughing my bum off right now.

but on second thought, my first semester result is a joke too! come on! gelak sama2!

truthfully, i'm crying my eyes out.

you are so cute

2011-01-23T03:31:00.000-08:00

everyone seems to make a post about babies. i want to join the partehh bebeh!

my adorably adorable nephew came to visit his Auntie Syaza today. (why is that sentence make it sound like i'm old?) Anyway, he is so adorable i tell you! adorable! he might get the look from his youngest Auntie. uhuk uhuk. wait wait. i got some pictures! jengg jengg jengg!

well, one picture will do. Moment after this, i will deffo post about this pretty baby more often so i warn you, beware! there will be cuteness overload here!

His name is Mohd Haiqal bin Mohd Shiraz. he's actually not even a month old yet. baru 3 weeks like that. that why he looks so small. can't wait to wait sampai dia dah besar sikit.

he is so well-behaved for a baby. Barely cried, anyone can carry him. but he's a sleepy head, oh god. play with his feet, his hand, touch his cheek, he still wont wake up.

His Nani(grandma) and his Dada(granpa) was like so happy when they brought Haiqal here, to Seri Kembangan. me? i was ecstatic! finally i can carry him! play with those cheeks. and baby smell so wangi!

to Haiqal, Auntie Syaza will see you again next week okay? grow bigger tau? <3

err, that is all i guess. i can't talk much bout this baby cause then you'll get jealous. hahahaha. okay maybe not.

i'll post other entry after this lah.. kot

this is a title

2011-01-20T06:10:00.000-08:00

hello lovely people of the earth.

I'M IN SERI KEMBANGAN NOW. WELL, THAT'S A BUMMER.

my semester break is 2 weeks, okay. so, i thought and hoping i might be spending my holiday at Perak, those whole two damn freaking awesome week. but but but... everything shattered into pieces, my hope that is.

A week in Manjung seems like a day to me. happened so fast. i want to sleep at my comfy comfy bed and rolling rolling on that bed like its mine, wait, it is mine. err. anyway, yes, i am in Seri Kembangan now, Equine Park to be exact and i feel like a loser i tell you. not much of a loser but a bum. yes, a bum. you know, BUM as in butt, ass, crack whatever you call. but don't ask me why i can relate myself to a bum. i don't know the answer either, frankly.

Lets just ignore what i wrote up there okay? it just need to be there.

where was i again, oh yah!

i don't think telling about my freakin holiday will be an exciting story to tell. main reason is i don't have an exciting story to tell. my 1 week holiday is fine but unproductive.

my laptop was sent to the lappy clinic as my lappy mappy was sick :( he got virus infection from some douchebag named email. poor him. but he's fine now! fast, clean, healthy as ever! :)

up there also, yup. you should ignore that as well.

so, for a day or two, i didn't have my lappy with me so i occupied my time with READing. I LOVE READING. i do but i don't READ as often as i used to. but when my mood to READ blasting, i READ. i mean i really READ. do i need to capitalize whenever i write READ? yes, compulsory. what for? i have no ikea eh, idea. so, for the 3 to 4 days where i occupied myself with books, i've read ;

1) STEPHEN KING - Everything's Eventual

2) CHARLOTTE BRONTE - Jane Eyre (old book i tell you, ancient!)

3) JUDITH MCNAUGHT - Until You

not gonna explain more about the books but let me tell you one thing, Stephen King is the best horror author i've ever discover.

So, now i'm going to read this one book. Know what it's called? of course you don't. i'll be scared if you do know what the book is.

Gosh, i am such a babbling WH***.

Its Falling Leaves by Adeline Yen Mah. A non - fiction book. oh, boy! one thing to ask from you guys. Wish me luck reading this book. i am pretty sure i gonna need those lucks! i am not good with non-fiction books okay. they're just seem so dull. wait, look whose calling a thing 'dull'. it's like a pot calling kettle black.

p/s : please don't runaway. i give you candy. nak?

p/s/s: im going to see my nephew tomorrow! wutt wutt! :D

xoxo,

syaza kamarudin

i am alive!

2011-01-19T04:31:00.000-08:00

i can feel my blog getting rusty. i can even see those spider webs at the corner of the screen. okay maybe not but still, it's been ages aint it? i feel so ashamed.

i am so sorry blog that i left you without any post. it's not that i abandon you or anything. maybe i do, okay maybe not. sayang, you need to understand my circumstances. i am quite busy nowadays, assignments were like water running through the longkang. too much, baby. bloggy baby, jangan la merajuk, see! i post an entry specially for you! i promise okay, i wont left you like i did before!

OMG SYAZA! SHUT THE FROST UP! YOU DONT DESERVE TO TALK OR WRITE ANYMORE. OKAY JUST KIDDING, YOU CAN, I LOVE YOU TOO MUCH TO NOT LET YOU WRITE.

huh?

well, okay. i think it is enough for now for a starter entry for 2011.

wutt wutt, can you believe it? its 2011 already?my baby bloggy is 3 years old already. how mummy proud of you :')

babbling babbling babbling..

alright. that is all for now. i'll be updating later about my ridiculous, absurd, boring, unworthy life, if you call that a life.

toodles!

p/s : i am on my semester break now. how my life seems so exci..... oh wait. nahhh

xoxo,

syaza kamarudin

syaza you are so stupid.

2010-09-14T15:19:00.001-07:00

i feel like updating my blog. maybe tomorrow :)

oh, wait! i already am! lol

i miss you guys, will post a real entry in a few days time. if you have been willing to wait for 4 months why not a few days more right? right? righhhttt? anybodyy? fine, i talk to a cyberwall. great. just damn great.

p/s: refer to the title, i would say that i am and frankly, i dont give a damn. mainly because i know you are as stupid as i am, LOVE.

xoxo,

syaza kamarudin

:)

2010-06-15T00:19:00.000-07:00

i am in such a happy mood today. well, not exactly but im better than previous days i had in unisel. i never said that i hated here. for me, there is nothing wrong with unisel. it is just i begin to feel kind of homesick. i miss my family, my room, my house and also my air conditioner. yes, i admit that i need my air conditioner. i've been sleeping in aircon since i was 3. can you imagine not to have aircon switch on while you sleep after 15 years doing so? it is kinda hellish for me frankly. what to say? i have told you guys many times, i am a spoiled brat :P but that is one of the "sacrifice" that i willing to take to succeed in life. chewah. haha. but it is true. right now, i only focus on making my baba and mama proud. that is all i want to do. they have done alot of things for me and now is the time for me to repay what they have given me throughout my life.

our family have their ups and downs and we still face those problem till this very day. so, i hope that atleast i can ease their burden by not financially since they still gave me pocket money, hehe but through moral and emotional support. i dont have the heart anymore to see their disappointed faces that caused by me. i want to pass with flying colours and make them proud to have a daughter like me. even though i know they always feel proud of me :)

ouh wait, i never told you about why am i so happy today eh? haha. well, i just found out that foundation students will have their mid term break on 10th of July for a week! yes bebeh, a week! ahaha. how am i not happy about this? its like hearing that you just got a million dollar check from anonymous!well, i am exaggerate a little bit arent i? fine, alot! haha. omg, i cant wait to go back to my be..... uhuk2 family. i kid i kid. how i miss my family so much. :)

till then,
syaza kamarudin

unisel?

2010-05-30T19:13:00.000-07:00

first time post a blog in unisel. wuhuu! im excited okay. i dont know i just do. it's like the first time i got my own handphone, only better than that. yes, better.

korang percaya ke apa aku cakap kat atas ni? kalau korang percaya mmg korang bukan kawan aku. ahahaha.

at first i thought i wanted to post new entry when i get back home to manjung because well, i dont really think i will get any idea to blog. i need like specific place and time for me to blog. by that i mean i need to be in my room for me to blog. for all the ideas to pour from my head to my fingertips then into this bloody computer. not literally mind you. lol. see, look how awful my karangan sounds like. anyway, im here not to entertain you. im here just to express my feeling s through blog and expend my knowledge and certain things. fully that.

cewah! haha. palehotak kau la expend knowledge hang. tulis pon merapu. pigidah!

alright2. im here today is to tell you guys about my few days in unisel. for me, its been fun so far. nothing happen to me yet that makes me despise unisel. well, it just one little...... wait no. there isnt any problem. everything is fine. but, ouh! apart for their heat it is. damn its hot in here. unbearable i should say. panas yang amat. for the first night im here. i cant even sleep. too hot. thank god the next day my dad brought a stand fan for me. so, i think i'll cope for a year.

ouh, and a thing. our house seriously need a refrigerator! like this instant. freakin necessity sial. i need my daily dosage of ice. you know as in ICE FREAKING CUBE! most of you guys know right that i am a hantu ais. i'll be all soft and clingy whenever i didnt get my ice.and then add in the weather to the equation. lagi macam nak mati.

damn, i write too long already and i have no idea what i write. nevermind, continue...

but you know what i like here? their timetable. its soo awesome okay. we only have classes from monday till thursday only. we dont have any class on friday. that means, i can go home on thursday evening! wuhhu beat that!

alright. need to cut it short. till next time!

p/s: sorry for my bad grammar or i should say whole essay. haha. in a rush babe. no time to check everything.

BYE!

2010-05-25T09:51:00.000-07:00

NEW PLACE, NEW ADVENTURE.

XOXO,

SYAZA KAMARUDIN

dictionary time!

2010-05-22T04:41:00.000-07:00

alright. so, here's the deal. i forget a lot. when i say a lot, i mean ALOT. so, now, i have a solution for me short term memory loss! everytime i found a new word that is quite hard for me, i will write it down here, so that i will not forget it later. or if i did forget, i will just open this post and walah! here there are. :)

ps: the definition that i provide here is 100% from me. it may sound ridiculous or makes no sense but that is how i understand it .

by that, first word.

decapitate - someones head that is nearly or already separate from its body. other word, beheading

amputate - lose your parts of body by surgery. like the doctor want to amputate your feat because of your diabetes.

corruption - bribe. rasuah.

allege - dakwa, accuse , sue

neurotic - its the same as neurosis. its a mental disorder something like that which cause by stress.

convey - to carry or bring. also to transport to another place

enroll - to register as in register new students .

volatile - means changeable, unstable , easily change

Enunciate - to make a formal statement, or to announce, proclain, declare etc

shortcoming - fail, deficiency , defective, u know all the negative stuff relate to fail.lol

tainted - to affect or as if a disease, spoiled, decaying. something along those lines.

contagious - infecting. like attraction to a thing. the smell of that perfume is contagious, i cant stop smelling it.

mutual - having same common thing between a person. something like love. the girl and the boy have mutual feelings about each other

regulation - controlling human or societal behavior by rules or restriction.

narcissistic - ego, devoting vain, can also be selfish. very vain la to conclude

ingratiate - bodek. tau bodek? suck up. haha

confiscate - rampas. take someones belonging because of their fault.

solely- only, exclusive, alone, like i did that solely for her.

Contentment is the experience of satisfaction and being at ease in one's situation.

emotional breakdown

2010-05-19T09:18:00.000-07:00

i cant bear with these problems anymore. how can many problems hit me in the face in just one freakin time? i know its dugaan and i need to take it as the way it is but i am not strong. i am never strong. i may look like one but deep down inside i am as fragile, easily volatile, as a cotton candy. yes, weird metaphor but that is how i feel right now. easily absorb and vanish once you get touch with water. anyway, lots of problem have been hitting my face lately.it's like "BAMM!". never know where it came from an in a split second, it's in front of you. sucks isnt it? yeah i know.

WHY MEEE????

i just wish money, grades, and ME didnt exist so that it wont effect other people around me with my continuous problems that i have jinx them with. i am truly sorry to everyone that i have cause problems with and i promise that right after this moment, i wont cause any problems to the ones i love and cherish the most especially my family. i am truly sorry as i failed on making you guys proud of me and burden you with my endless problems. but i believe in karma. you guys are the best and nicest person i have ever met and by that, sooner or later the rainbow will be shining at you guys and swept all the pain away.

i dont even know what i am writing. i dont feel like myself today so, i am sorry if anything that i wrote offended you.

from now on, SYAZA BINTI KAMARUDIN will take a vow that she will never ever dissapoint her parents and family ever again, will study her bum off, and make sure that she will succeed in life.

*baba and mama, if you are reading this. i love you so much and thank you for all the support that you have been given me from the day i was born till this very day. i love you so much and i promise you that i will bring success to you. after what all you have done for me, financial and emotional support, i cant even bear thinking on letting you guys down again. i know we aren't rich but you guys provide me with everything i need and want for that matters. I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART AND SOUL.

**i am crying as i am typing this.see, i told you i am a cotton candy.

tagged!

2010-05-06T06:57:00.000-07:00

i've got tagged by dearest rara fadzil :)

thanks 4 the tag babe. i really need to update my post but got no ideas for that. now, you have ease my burden!

Adakah anda rasa hot ?
- haha. ye saya memang hot. ikut musim.

Upload wallpaper pc/laptop yang anda guna sekarang.

Cerita pasal wallpaper itu.
- saya tak kaya nak beli mac tapi saya insist on using one. jadi saya makeover my dekstop to mac when the truth is its just windows xp.lol. ouh an the wallpaper is cute isnt it. a big ass crusor.lol. or is it a mickey's hand?

Bila kali terakhir makan pizza ?
last month

Lagu terakhir anda dengar ?
paranoid, jonas brothers

Selain nama sendiri , anda dipanggil nama apa ?
- errr. caza and sya :)

Tag 5 orang kawan anda.
- fira roslim
- khai janapi
- termizi muhammad
- isa yusoff
- you.

Siapakah orang no.1 bg anda ?
- my bestfriend for 6 years and many years to come :)

Katakan sesuatu kepada orang no.2
- kau comel aku jeles :D

No.3 ada hubungan dengan siapa ?
-apa nama girlfriend mizi eh, ouh! izzaty. haha. aku x kenal harap maaf.

Bagaimana pula orang no.4 ?
- budak tuh tak tentu so currently dia single kot.

Kata kata cinta untuk orang no.5
- i love you, whoever you are :D

Berikan 5 perkara yang anda tahu tentang orang yang mengetag anda.
- dia sangat comel
- dia ada lesung pipit and the dimple sangat dalam ok? jeles.
- the way she write in her blog makes me ashamed of my own blog. lol

- dia pakai cermin mata
- lemah lembut

Gay or less ?
- happy or kurang? apa kejadahnya soklan ni tny? haha

Perasaan anda buat tag ini ?
- hahaha. takde perasaan

sigh

2010-04-30T09:55:00.000-07:00

clearly not what i expected. i dont even remember i put this course in my upu form. teknologi maklumat? what exactly do they teach and what do i learn? ya Allah, i dont know what to think. thank you Allah for giving me the opportunity to pursue my studies. i am truly grateful. it is just that i dont think i will be going there. u know, UTHM. nothing against the uni. this is just not the course i want. i cant learn something that i dont have interest in. i really just cant. i took science stream during my high school and look how i end up? i just cant repeat the same mistakes i did before.i cant bear it anymore.i havent told my parents yet about this. maybe tomorrow. sigh. god please give me strength to live the life that you gave to me. i really need those, badly.

hey peeps justin bieber is going through puberty.

2010-04-29T23:32:00.000-07:00

hahahaha. finally that dang toddler is hitting puberty. i thought he will never be a man. lol. i laugh so hard when i read it at perez hilton. i am like,

"wtf? justin beiber is going through puberty? ROFL" and then guling guling guling.

well, its not that i am a fan of him. i dont really give a dang about him. its just the mental picture of him with his cracked voice and a face like that? admit it, it is quite a funny thing to imagine.

okay, justin's lunatic fan. put your knife, hammer down. bukan aku kutuk pon suami hang si justin tuh. suara dah pecah nak buat apa. aku perli jer. hahaaha

alright then, quit with justin bieber. its not my intention to write about him in the first place. (welll, it is actually. lol. i was just living in denial).

DELUSIONAL @.@'

well, actually i just wanted to say that tomorrow result upu keluar. yes peeps. tomorroww. how i am scared to death. my parents had ask me what did you want to do if i didnt get the course i wanted. i'll say STPM always open its arm for me. no worries. and they give the look. you know, the LOOK. the look where they think i am joking with them but they doubt it i am but deep inside they do think im joking but the truth is i am not. =.=' yeah like that. lol. but yeah. STPM has always be my choice if i got no offer from universities.

why am i stuck on words today? ayat tak keluar lah. sorry. need to cut it short

till again. bye bye!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. your voice cracked JB?

DEPRESS

2010-04-20T05:27:00.000-07:00

depress depressdepress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress ddepress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depressdepress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depressdepress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress ddepress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depressdepress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depressdepress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress ddepress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depressdepress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depressdepress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress ddepress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depressdepress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress depress

YES I AM FLIPPIN DEPRESS, YOU HEAR ME? DEPRESS! I SWEAR IF I SEE AN ANT, I'LL KILL EM! I'LL KILL EM ALL!

alright, here the thing. i wont tell you why i am depress because i think you guys already know from the previous post that i'd posted. i feel like i am such a failure, loser, ungrateful little bitch. alright dont have to defend me saying

"of course you are not. got lots of things to do in life than just what you are seeing right now"

yeah yeah yeah, what you guys did not know is i am a bitch, a choosy bitch that do not deserve any special treatment that I've been getting since i was little kid. i have what i need and i got what i want. well, dont jump to conclusion that i am not grateful of what i got. it is just that i realize that all this thing that i have made me what i am today. i took advantage of it. i did not use of what i got for good purposes. i did not use it to make me a better person.i am such a shallow person.

so now, i want to start a new life, new me. if i given a chance, just one more chance to redeem what i have done before, i wont take it for granted. i can't. so, please god give me one more opportunity to redeem myself, to show you and my family that i am not as shallow, spoiled little brat as they might think i am. just once.

i have write this thing still this feeling wont subside. this uneasiness . i dont know what to do anymore. goodbye for now

advance warning.

2010-04-08T07:06:00.000-07:00

after this moment, my entry will PROBABLY be kind of sad, emo, angst, heart broken etc etc. you know the deal so, i am just giving you an advance warning not to hate me after this. i am not saying that it will definitely be like what i stated above. just maybe because right now i have no intention at all to be giddy, happy, or comfortable.

i feel like i let my family down, i let my parents down and most of all i let myself down. frankly, i feel so devastated and disappointed in myself. i really confuse in what i am going to do with my life. heard that few of my friends got the interview for the course they want. i'm so happy for them :') just another step and they will positively be in universities they choose. how lucky of them. as for me, let faith lead me. i feel nausea just thinking about this. that is what you get for not trying hard enough syaza. that is what you deserve, and you shouldn't regret it. it is too late for that. yes, it is right?

alrighty then. my mind just blank right now. i'm thinking of writing persuasion letter after this.i don't think it will help though. but worth a try right?

p/s : i am writing this not to gain your sympathy.no offense babe. i have no intention at all. i'm just expressing what i had in mind. that is all. but please don't take this the wrong way.

I LOVE YOU GUYS! <3

another crappy emo session

2010-04-07T06:37:00.000-07:00

i got this unpleasant feeling in my stomach. u know? they called it butterflies in your stomach i think. feeling like you want to throw up, your palm sweaty, got no appetite, you can't keep your mind off certain things. you feel like crying, you're moody all the time. well, it happens to me right on this moment! lately, i have been getting this much frequent as i used to. and i hate it, but you know what, hate is an understatement, I LOATH IT!

i bet everyone have been through this. i dont know why im telling you this. i just need to get it out of my chest, right here right now. because if i didnt, i dont know how i can bear with it anymore. i might burst into tears the whole fucking night. trust me, i've done that few times and its not a pretty sight the next morning it is. with those baggy red eyes, red nose, swollen face, husky voice. one of my flaws is that i cant control my sympathy, empathy, sadness, emotional state to sum it up very well. if i want to cry, i'll cry. i can control my anger perfectly mind you. just the crying part. damn thats hard.

back to the first paragraph, the butterflies in the stomach part. okay, why am i getting those damn thing today? because today it hit me that i might never getting into IPTA . i got no chance with my SPM result i think. its not that my results are bad. but its not in flying colours. IPTS overflows me with dozens of offering letters but they did not have the course that i wanted. so, better not take it if you are going to learn something that you are not interested in. i dont want to regret it later.

by that, i lost hope in IPTA. i feel like crying right now and maybe i will after this. :') but, i wont give up that easily. so, what if i didnt get IPTA, its not like my life would be over. (but i still pray hard for me to get IPTA.) i have made my choice to continue for STPM. yes, i will. i'll study harder and better in STPM. but, i rather being in IPTA. if somehow i got into IPTA, i will never ever take advantage of it. i promise.

damn that's alot of IPTA there.lol

anyway, that is all for now.

xoxo,

syazy

notification : formspring

2010-04-05T08:58:00.000-07:00

this not an entry.

just a notification that i got a formspring account.

www.formspring.me/syazakama

just click on that url :)

with that u can ask me anything. i repeat, ANYTHING that you had in mind.

maybe you have something that you wanted to say to me but not ready or brave enough to tell me face to face or even you want to ask me something out of your curiousity, then that is the place! you can ask me questions without me knowing its you. :)

or maybe you just want to ask some random questions like that. go on. do it :)

thats all then . toodles!

this is ridiculous!

2010-03-26T07:33:00.001-07:00

i feel like babbling again. babble babble babble. alright so, life's pretty normal so far. apart from that i still cant manage to throw away the guilt on failing to make my parents proud of me. my SPM results sucks ass. clearly not what i expected. kinda ashamed of it, frankly. my parents did not show that they are disappointed in me but still, you can still feel it. i have an intuition that they put high hope in me to succeed and i bluntly disappoint them. but nothing i can do anymore that could change what that had been done. maybe i should just stop being so soppy and sissy all the time and just accept what had been done is done. ouh, i hate it so much.

damn i dont have anything to tell you guys. nothing productive lingering in my mind for this time being as i am getting so occupied cleaning the house, do the chores around the house because we have sent out maid home back to indonesia because my parents think that we do not need her services anymore as i will be going to uni in a few months and there will be no one in house anymore except for my parents. so, by the mean time im going to uni, i will be doing all the chores and frankly, i dont mind at all. but some of my friends said im too spoiled to do all the work. here's a scenes which went something like that

"how on earth or you going to survive without your maid syaza?"

"what's that supposed to mean? "

"you've been having a maid for all your life, who's going to clean up your room, clean the house and everything? you said it yourself that your mom is sick."

"well, i'm going to do all the work la, who else?"

(with a cynical look)"you, syaza? princess syaza would do all the work?ahah"

"are you trying as polite as possible to tell me that i am a spoiled little brat that can't do any work in the house?" (please say no)

"yes, exactly what i meant"

"cis kurang ajar. =.='"

i dont know why people think that im a spoiled brat. i am not! i dont sulk or mad if i didnt get what i want or things didt go my way. my parents taught me well that you cant possibly get anything you want. my parents are quite strict on certain things. but they do spoil us their children with material things.lol but other than that, no.and they teach us to be a better person and proudly i would say they did a good job on that. :)

alright then. i feel no mood on writing anymore. till next time!

toodles!

its just merely 4 month!

2010-01-14T03:48:00.000-08:00

hello beautiful and handsome creatures of the earth. how you guys feeling today? good? not so good? well, i just hope you guys doing hella fine today. :)

errrr. gosh its so awkward to write blog again since i've left this blog with no new entries for heaven sake knows how long. i think its 4-5 months is it? its almost half a year. yeah, sorry about that. i wont give you any reasons for that since i dont want to make any lame excuses. it is just what it is. in addition, i dont think theres anyone that still read my blog. i used to have a few avid reader here but they may have left me since they thought i was dead or something. thank god i didnt. i dont want to die virgin you know.its too unfortunate for me that is.eheh

so, its 2010 bebeh. oh god. its hard to believe actually. i feel like yesterday i was celebrating new millennium with all the fireworks and everything. and actually its been 10 years already? time do fly fast. i wish time would fly slower than that. even tad slower would be enough. its just that im really not ready yet to face the outside world you know, the real, real vicious one. i still wanted to be fed, to be pampered just like in high school but unfortunately, good bye to that. no more.

well, currently as most of you may know that i am right now living my life as high school graduate. ouh, just like honeymoon. no school, no homework, no teachers judging me yada yada yada... but after a while this honeymoon has becoming just like a never ending nightmare!well, not exactly but still. i have been doing nothing than just sitting around house, watching movies online, chatting. its just fun no more. i feel like puking doing the same thing again and again and again. you know how it feels right? like you just love eating lasagna for instant, for a few days you feel like youre the luckiest man in the world got to eat your favourite food every sngle day of your bloody life. then, you started to get bored with lasagna and demand for anthng else but lasagna. still they will fed you with lasagna. it feels like you are associate with devil or something. whatever i babbling too much. its getting ridiculous on how bad my English has become. just 2 months away from school and my usage of English word got so disastrous.

ahhhh. i feel like an old woman with no life right now theres nothing interesting happen in my life. even old woman got something to talk about everyday. well, i think im going to stop here. this entry will be such a catastrophe to read. im sorry if you shit blood after reading this awfully written entry. i swear it will get better in no time. but hey, i cant please everyone cant i? whatever, im high right now from the painkiller i just consume.

sorry again for first, havent update for quite some time and second, you are actually shitting blood.

bye bye.

latest addiction

2009-08-29T06:46:00.000-07:00

we meet again, people of the earth.

let me introduce you guys to my latest and current addiction.

IT'S COBRA STARSHIP !<3<3>

seriously babes, i just cannot get enough of them. their music, their style, their faces, every single thing of them are like drugs to me! i mean, it is really hard to put this in words since there's no words to describe the way i am feeling when i listens to their songs. i would listens to their song and forget about everything around me. i pluck in earphones and maximize the volume and walah!im completely high!

so much of an addiction eh? trust me, when i am addict with something, i will be completely head over heels for it. i experienced my first addiction is when i was 13. i was watching mtv at tat time, and then song stickwitu came out and BAMM! i was addicted to THE PUSSYCAT DOLLS. yes, them. i would listened to their songs every single day and not getting bored. my dekstop wallpaper would be their pictures as well as my handphone wallpaper. it dindt help reduce my fanatics over them when my bestest friend, FIRA was 100 times fanatical over them. i dont know wether she still love PCD or not but for me, it was history :) but i still like them though.

ok ok, back to cobra starship. OMG! i am completely crazy over themmmmmmm!!! yes, i love them and i am not exagerating! last few months, i was just lurking around the web.(yes, i lurk. =.=') and bumped into one of their song, which is good girl gone bad. i fell in love with that song on the spot! then, i felt like the voice of the lead singer sounds familiar. i google them and found out they are the one that sing songs like the city at wat and guilty pleasure. my favourite songs a year ago!still am actually.

by that, my google search begin...

yes, when i am obsessed with certain band i would google them and read EVERYTHING ABOUT THEM. from pictures to articles, to gossips and videos! they got videos that they record from their tour and others.they are sooo funny! (oh god, i sounded like creepy little stalker.oh wait! i am).

i have put lots and lots of their videos into my handphone so that i can watch them when i am bored or something. what else, ouh, yeah my handphone wallpaper will be no other them COBRA STARSHIPP!!muahahah(not funny bitch!) and then and then my ringtone also cobra starship. errr... my message ringtones also cobra starship. blablablaaa.....

arghh.. i think need to stop writing. if i continue, this entry will be really bore to read as it is not boring enough already. haishh.

and for your guys with perverted and "gatal" minds. i give you the lead singer of cobra starship band

*FAINT*

anyway, here are some songs that i recommend you to listen. :)

1. this city at war .2.guilty pleasure 3. good girl go bad 4. hot mess 5. you're not in on the joke 6. wet hot american summer 7. the church of hot addiction

number 3-6 are from their latest album HOT MESS.

ENJOY!

P/S: sorry fo my immature and childish usage of english language. im trying to improve here. dont judge me please? :)

happy birthday to me.

2009-08-19T09:20:00.000-07:00

eheheh.. im legally 17 everyone! well, legal lah sangat. but i felt so much mature now. i felt like being 17 is a new responsibility for me to be more responsible and respectful to my self as well to others. oh, i felt so old! anyways, thank you baba for buying me new SWATCH fo my birthday. i promise you that i will take good care of my swatch. i wont drop my swatch in the toilet bowl again. i solemnly swear. :) thank you baba!i love you so much! and to mama, thank you for the perfume. i really need one since my perfume nak dekat habis.eheh. i love you too mama! and abang yarz! thanks for the 50 dollars. i know you not that good in buying presents so, i really appreciate that 50 . :) and kak liz. im still waiting for your present! eheh.

well, at 12am sharp on 19th august 2009, i got knocks on my door and theres baba and mama wishing me happy birthday and gave me kisses. awww.. i love you guys so much! and then i got a call from my brother, abg yarz, then my sis, kak liz. also got a message from kak alis, abg yarz's fiancee. and lastly from kak liz's boyfie. :) and i got countless messages from you guys,me friends! it mean so much to me. thanks a lot.

so, my family and i celebrated my birthday by what else, eat cakes la!we all went to secret recipe and order three pieces of cakes. yeah. we dont buy whole cake. everyone in my family try to cut down some sugar. i got to choose what cakes i want. so, i chose chocolate indulgance, raspberry cheese and chocolate chip walnut. yummy! then after that, we went for our dinner in our favourit diner, lead view hotel. i'll put some pictures.

syaza the lazy bitch

2009-07-25T23:20:00.000-07:00

hello everyoneeeeeee!
omg, i miss you guys! do you miss me? no? ouh, okay(run away).

wow, i thought dust bunny will grow on my blog since i havent update it for ages. sorry about that. there are few people ask me why i havent update my blog. frankly to say. i got no time at all(well, i do i was just plain lazy).besides, i will not be able to online during weekdays. dont ask me why. i jusk cant.(tears.) oh, another reason is because, well i just have no idea at all what im going to write here. everytime i got ideas to write about something2, theres always be obstacles. well, not that much of an obstacles but well, some issues if you need to put it in a lighter way.

"ouh, what the fork are you babbling about, bitch?"

"shut up you 'voice in my head'!you are not freakin real!"

GET ME A SHRINK THIS INSTANT! IM GOING INSANE!

yesterday was the day i thought it was hell! it was beyond hell! i had massive migrain, menstrual pain, and my back hurts like i was paralysed. yes, it may sound nothing to you or you even say im exeggerating,making things up. but im so freaking not! ok, so i was in pain and i consumed god knows how many pills but still the pain wont reduce. suddenly, when i did this just one thing, all my pain just fade away. just like that! you know what i did? I SIGNED IN TO MYSPACE. yes, as horrible as it may sound,myspace saved my life, metaphorically(sp?) im ashamed of it. yes i do.am i sane? tell me. am i sane? i dont think i am.

ANYWAY, my birthday is just around the corner babes! 19 august. put that on your reminder. i wont ask you to buy me presents, wishes form you guys would be more than enough. but if you insist on buying me presents, well...

I WANT MONEY$$$$! LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS OF IT!
(money is not even a thing =.=')

bole?ahahaha. im such a moneylover-whore.

ok, that is all. toodles everyone!

oh, baru tahu

2009-06-07T00:52:00.000-07:00

lets write in malay shall we?

aha. korang nak tahu? sepanjang 13 tahun menggunakan komputer, barulah aku tahu ada butang ni:

ahahahaha..punyalah kurang informasi aku ni.

baru tahu butang tu bole digunakan untuk tangkap screenshot. i mean like seriously. for all this time i wonder how lot of people took their screenshot.are they using special software? baru lah harini tergerak hati nak cuba google. and barulah tahu yang nak amik screenshot tak susah langsung! itu la. tak cuba tahu kan? ahaha. and tergerak hati ni pon sebab nampak nyza ada gambar screenshot dalam blog dia. ahaha. terima kasih niza kerana you influence me to explore something that i might never know.thank you. :)

so, sekarang bole la screenshot byk2! best betol bendalah ni ;D

hey you!yes you!

2009-05-09T01:47:00.001-07:00

i got a new phone, creatures!

oh yes i did. it was LG KF300. the first time i laid my eyes on the phone, i knew that will be my love of my life(metaphorecally [sp?]). i love it so much! the external looks really good and shiny and pretty and pretyy and pretty. yes. some might think im exegerating but im not.

before this, i was using sony ericsson K530i. i actually downgraded the phone in function section. the SE one has 3G ability but not the LG. and there are some other flaws in LG phone such the camera quality and a lil bit of this and that. other than tht, its perfect! i dont really using the camera or music player in my phone since i already have digital cam and mp3 as well as laptop.

so, im hunting for a phone that have the best design and colour and it seems that LG got everything that i needed and the price is affordable too!

well, actually at first i wanted to buy LG kf 350 aka icecream but then i changed my mind. its too expensive. im broke! well, im not using my money,its my dads but still, its too pricy and its not that pretty pon.lol

anyway, anyone listening to good girls go bad by cobra starship feat leighton meester? i love the song. that song has been my addiction for the past few days. and who would think leighton meester aka blair from gossip girl can sing? shocker! i recommend you to go and listen :)

2009-04-12T06:00:00.000-07:00

to you. yes, you.

i just want you to know.
right on this moment.
my tears falling,
and i will,
cry myself to sleep.

eleh, senang jer.

2009-03-29T04:32:00.001-07:00

okay, so yesterday and today, my dad taught me how to drive. and frankly, it's harder than i thought it would be. well, maybe because i thought it's a piece of cake(as if). first time i sat in the driver's seat, all kinds of emotion going through my veins, capillary, arteries yada yada yada.excitements, happy, anxious, nauseous, any possible emotions you could think of.

so, my dad taught me the basic first. clutch(spell betol x?), break, tekan minyak, gear, all sort of things.i was quite confident i can do it. i watched how it's function as my dad driving,it looked really flippin easy. so, the moment came, its my turn to drive. turn on the engine,check.tekan clutch, check. break turun, check. masuk gear 1, check. now, it leave for me to tekan the minyak.so, here it goes...

^*(&^$#%&^%&^%**(&(*^&%&^$#%$% bang! booom!boom!
(engine mati.)

"SYAZA, UR NOT SUPPOSED TO LET GO OF THE CLUTCH CEPAT SANGAT!!" my dad yelled at me as soon as the engine mati.

"HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW!" I said defending my self. (=.=')

grrr.screw you kancil!(i still love you, kancil ku sayang)

well, throughout the lesson,my dad yells at me everytime the engine died, i went too closely to the sidewalk, didnt stop when he told me to and some other things. strange is, i didnt cry!aha. i will definitely cry if my dad yells at me even die marah suam2 kuku jer. lol so, it was an achievement for me.

the first time driving a car wasnt that bad actually. my dad even said i was slightly better than my sister on her first day.. ego boost! ahaha. today, my dad taught me again. it went unbelievebly smooth.i drive about 30 km/h. i just cant believe it. and the engine just died twice!lol(note: engine died 5 to 6 times on my first try.) aww.&*im so proud of my self!

*(ko perasan tak bertempat, syaza.)

so, basically, my dad will teach me to drive every weekend until i become expert and only god knows when would that be, next month, or another month or even next year?we'll see.

and im going to driver's license after SPM!
together everyone... LAMBATNYAAAA.....!!!
yeah, i know.

what to do, my birthday on August. haishhh

surveyyy.

2009-03-16T22:44:00.000-07:00

grabbed it from firafall

WORD ASSOCIATION:

Write the first word/thing/person that comes into your head when you read this word
1. coffee: starbucks
2. dog: haramm
3. slut: miley cyrus
4. candy: no moree.
5. pole: stripping
6. ocean: sunburn
7. school: friends!
8. bugs: ladybugs
9. cookie: jar
10. singing: rockstar
11. life: stressful
12. child: one day.

WHICH WOULD YOU PREFER:
Ten guilty men go free OR One innocent man goes to jail for life
Eaten by a lion OR Eaten by thousands of small insects
A life of contentment without love OR A life with love and heartache
Skydiving from a plane OR Bungee jumping off a bridge
No television OR No music
No more pizza, ever OR No more chocolate, ever
A trip to Europe OR a trip to Hawaii
An hour with your future soul mate OR An hour with a loved one
No longer being able to cry OR No longer being able to feel the need to cry
Sex without love OR love without sex
Loving someone who doesn't love you OR being loved by someone you don't love

ouh!saya terkena!

2009-02-25T01:38:00.000-08:00

alright ok!
ive been tagged by chi-bob aka imal shafie.

it my first time so im pretty excited!;D
thanks to him for tagging me!yeay!ahaha

so, here it goes!

RULES:
1. Put your iTunes, iPod, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer
3. You must write that song name down NO MATTER HOW silly it sounds.
4. Put any comments in brackets after the song name.
5. Put this on your journal/blog.Ok, here goes my answers.

1. If someone says, “Is this okay?” … you say?
the rasmus-in the shadow (x ok,look fat on you.lol)

2. How would you describe yourself?
imran ajmain- seribu tahun(ouh, im not tht old. baru jer errr 13 thn.=.=')

3. what do you like in a girl/guy?
benny benassi-satisfaction(aha. the song explains everything.:D)

4. How do you feel today?
kardinal offishall feat keri hilson-tide is high( err.ok ok)

5.What is your life’s purpose?
mcfly-five colours in her hair( i do want to colour my hair but not in 5 colors.ahaha)

6. What is your motto?
A-teen - cant help falling in love with you(no money no love.jokejoke)

7. What do your friends think of you?
backstreetboys-climbing the walls( im no cicak la!)

8. What do you think of your parents?
s club 7- have you ever (i have ever love my parents the most.muahh!)

9. What do you think about very often?
marie digby-say it again.( what?can u say it again?lol)

10. What is 2 + 2?
elliot yamin-wait for you.(i'll wait for your answer oke?)

11. What do you think of your best friend?
jonas brothers-lovebug(i kinda hv lovebug caught for a friend.aha*blush)

12. What do you think of the person you like?
matta band-jatuh cinta lagi( not again?!yeah2crushcrush.)

13. What is your life story?
taylor swift-love story(totally opposite of the song.=.=')

14. What do you want to be when you grow up?
boys like girls-head over heels.( i want to be a heel designer like jimmy choo?no idea.lol)

15. What do you think of when you see the person you like?
mcfly-just my luck (my luck kot terjumpa die.lala)

16. What will you dance to at your wedding?
jordin sparks-one step at a time (menari jgn gopoh2.1 step at a time)

17. What will they play at your funeral?
katy perry-wish you the worst( mmg suke aku mati la tuh!ceh)

18.What is your hobby/interest?
amy winehouse-fuck me pumps.(oh no fuck2.not interested at all.siyes tak suke.lol)

19. What is your biggest fear?
britney spears-womanizer(well, biggest fear would be darkness but i do fear womanizer.gi main jauh2,womanizer.jgn dekat ngn aku)

20. What is your biggest secret?
the maine-girls do what they want(my secrets would be i can do whatever i want even i said i cant.make sense?)

21. What do you think of your friends?
the script-the man who cant be moved(i cant be moved when im defending my beloved friends.thats how i think of my friends and how much they worth to me)

i want to tag
1.appleista
2.pojie
3.you,you and you.yes,you!

confessions of a stupid teenager.

2009-02-21T05:26:00.000-08:00

im impressed.
i really am.
im impressed on how a single message from your friend can turn your day around from happy to fucked up. im not naming names the one who sent it but that message really does hurt me. i dont know why it means so much to me. im crying as i type this entry. i was smiling 15 minutes earlier. i was happy 15 minutes earlier. i was ungloomy 15 mintes earlier.

i didnt hold any grudge on them but i just feel misplaced right on this moment. i love whoever he/she is. i do. God, please make this feeling go away. i hate it so much. i know he/she didnt mean to.i'm sure. why am i such a sissy? always cry for stupid things, cry for something thats not worth crying for.

God, give me strength. i really need that desperately. i cant hold on much longer. i want to be stronger and as bad as it may sound, i want to be HEARTLESS.

p/s: no, no one breaks my heart neither from boys nor girls. im just hurt by someone that i care.

I STILL LOVE THEM NO MATTER WHAT.THAT IS MY PROMISE AND keeping my words is my middle name.

p/s2; don't worry, this feeling will pass after a few hours.i'll be back to normal in no time.

menyampah aku!

2009-02-03T08:13:00.000-08:00

A to the double N to the O to the Y!
ANNOY!
yeah!

i want to tell you guys something ni.
come herecome here..
here... i want to tell you this.
ala, ini la..
i want to tell you about this anoyying this ah. stupid fu**er annoying things i hate.
of course i hate ah. x kan suka kot.lalala

cut the freakin crap syaza!
alright2! sheesh.

i hate the sound of my aircorn makes when its overfreeze.bodo annoying la!
i hate when my hairs oily.
i hate when someone intrude my space.
i hate when someone knocks on the door continuosly.
i hate stupid people who act they are the master. master your own head la!
i hate cheap clothes.
i hate handphones. it annoys me like bab 1!
i hate it when bitch2 dekat tution buat class tu nenek dorang punye. ko nak gossip2 pergi duduk tepi longkang. aku nak belajar physics, ko nak belajar carik jantan!bebal
i hate when they borrow your stuff then gv it bck when its like shit and no apologies or even thanks!
i hate poeple rebond their hair but i dont have anything against people straighten their hair. no, its diff things la!
i hate immitation things
i hate people use immitation things and brag like they buy it beribu2 ribu ringgit. hotak ko!
i hate rempits clan. geli nak mati la!
i hate school toilets.ewww.
i hate over-romantic guys. soo annoying!
i hate people who hate cheese.lol
i hate yellow.
i hate people who speaks like all of us are deaf and vice versa
i hate miley cyrus. gedik nak mati
i hate overrated people.
i hate show off people.
i hate when there's nothing to do.
i hate homeworks.
i hate when hantu disturb me.
i hate darkness. nyctophobic anyone?

to be continued...

i am a jelous type.

2009-02-03T07:47:00.000-08:00

yes. i do think i am. i've been jelous to everyone i knew. friends particularly. it seems that i just cant stand when someone has something more and better than me. i'll give you some examples of how 'multiracial' my jelousy are

example 1
branded stuffs. if my friend have for example roxy purse. i'll be flippin jelous! i mean real jelous! even the one with the roxy purse is perfectly harmless, as she didnt show any sign of braging or whatsoever, i still will be really jelous of her. i will want to buy something more branded or more pricy than hers.

example 2.
i'll be really jelous when someone smarter than me. i know i know, everyone does but my situation is kinda different than anyone else(maybe). if someone is smarter than me, i'll feel insecure and STUPID. note the capital letters please. yes. i do feel stupid. do you guys too? i dont know how to elaborate it any further. i will be just really jelous and sometimes i will cry just because of how i think how stupid i am even i know i am not that stupid of a person.

example 3.
im jelous of people with slim figure. im a chubby and flabby lady with loads of unwanted waste products inside of me.LOL. but im not real fat as in obesity. im just full. yes. so, when i see someone with slim and attractive figure and then look at myself, my self esteem will fall dooowwwnnnn to the drain. i envy them. really envy. they look so...kurus. but im not even a glance of jelousy to anorexic people. in fact, i pity them. i just want to throw fries or burger to them. seriously. anorexic?disgusting!

example 4
i envy people with talents. i've seen my friends with their talent. some of them really good in photography, art, singing, dancing, socializing and even make others pretty! while me, still searching of what im good at. sometimes i wonder do i have talents? i believe i do, yes i do hae talent or talents . maybe i just havent discover it yet.maybe soon.

ouh!i've already really no mood to write anymore. i think 4 examples would be enough right?
so, tell me? do you think its normal of am i just over react with it? thank you.tata!doodles!

xoxo
syaza kamarudin

we had fun.

2009-01-31T06:14:00.000-08:00

saya suka makan kacang

2009-01-25T09:23:00.000-08:00

(muke bile nak start belajar biology, sejarah dan agama islam.lol)

3 posts in one day?wow syaza!im impressed!lol. yeah. ive posted another one. nak lepaskan geram almost a month tak post apa2 kan.hohohoho. above, thats how i look at this moment. mengantuk, buruk, penat, mata panda and banyak lah. u can see for your self how bad i look in those pics.

i cant sleep nowadays. i want to sleep but theres something block me from from doin it. it seems like this bloody thing dont want me to get some rest. i need some sleep and rest too! you know what prevent me from being normal? TEKANAN! yes, ive been stressful for this past few weeks. i didnt show it but it eating me inside already. i think i need a lot of happy pills and double lots of sleeping pills.no, not to suicide stupid!to sleep!duhh.

sorry guys, i have no idea what to write anymore. my mind froze just now. no idea to write anymore. ive just watched fireworks outside my house. try to snap some nice pics with my sony A350 but failed. why am i telling this? i dont know. stab me with your pencil if you dont like it.bla bla bla..

bye bye!

i miss her.

2009-01-25T07:39:00.000-08:00

NURUL ZAFIRAH BINTI ROSLIM!

I MISS YOU SO FREAKING BADLY!

YOU ARE MY BESTEST FRIEND EVER AND I LOVE YOU LAH, BUT I THINK YOU ALREADY KNOW THAT. ;D

YOU NEED TO KNOW EVEN WE BARELY MEET EACH OTHER NOW, YOU ARE STILL MY NO 1 BEST FRIEND! YOU'RE MY TOP 1 IN MYSPACE!LOL

I FEEL BAD THAT YOU'RE THE ONE THAT CALLED ME WHENEVER YOU HAVE TIME. NEXT TIME I CALL YOU PULAK OK!

OUH! BERAPA LAMA TAK JUMPA KO HUH?DAH 2 WEEKS KER 3 WEEKS KAN?GILE RINDU KO LAH! LEPAS NI KITE KENE HANGOUT BYK2 KALI TAU!

malam chinese new year la!

2009-01-25T07:03:00.000-08:00

ah, kekok rasanya nak tulis blog semula. minta maaf tuan2 dan puan2 terutama sekali mak cik shada yang dah merungut sambil mengugut;

"syaza! we're not friends anymore kalau ko tak update blog ko!"

yeah. =.='

as if. tade lah. tak ada masa lah nak update blog. sibuk sangat- sangat dengan kerja sekolah yang tak hent-henti mencurah macam air. tahu lah tahun ni SPM(i still dont know what it mean peeps.) sepatutnya tak perlu la bagi banyak- banyak kerja sekolah. kalau nak bagi pown, bagi kat budak-budak kelas yang malas nak belajar.saya berada di dalam kelas yang hampir 99% muridnya belajar. tak bagi homework pon tak pe. kami masih belajar.lol. sepatutnya mengikut timetable yang digubah oleg anak kamarudin bernama syaza ini, pada waktu ini saya sepatutnya belajar biology bab 3 tingkatan 4 tapi... tak perlulah cakap mengapa. memalukan.

mengapa harini ni blog dalam bahasa melayu?tanya cikgu saya.cikgu bahasa melayu saya kata bahasa melayu saya agak tidak memuaskan. ayat-ayat yang saya gunakan dalam karangan sangat simple. kalau saya tidak berusaha untuk meningkatkan penguasaan bahasa mealyu saya, Spm nanti tentu tak dapat A1. wtfish? mati aku mcm ni! argghhh! i speak malay almost all the time!macam mana bahasa melayu tak bagus? ni semua salah ....salah....salah...... argh! i need to put the blame on someone!!!!sedih sedih. bahasa melayu dah teruk, bahasainggeris lagi la dah masuk longkang. what should i do? ahhh! screw you!

TAHUN 2009 INI SYAZA BINTI KAMARUDIN AKAN MENDUDUKI PEPERIKSAAN SIJIL PELAJARAN MALAYSIA.

BAHASA MELAYU A1
BAHASA INGGERIS A1
MATEMATIK TAMBAHAN A1
MATEMATIK MODEN A1
BIOLOGY A2
PHYSICS A2
CHEMISTRY A2
SEJARAH A2
AGAMA ISLAM A1

yes, no that are not typos there. i dont expect my result will be 9A1. no, i dont expect that. i just want 9A's. it would be enough for me. in fact, i dont expect all the science subjects to be A's at all. i dont want to be anything that involve in science, so why should i concern about my science right?let it be. but im studying all out right now. no more play2 like last year. i do regret that i didnt stdy hard enough but what is past will be past right. people! pray for my success and pray for me to be a lil more diligent. ;D
love yah!

2009

2009-01-01T08:31:00.000-08:00

hey guys!
it's 2009 already!

wah!tak sangka eh.ahaha.
im going to be 17 in 8 months.
cant wait!

sorry, but i think im out of ideas what to write today.
but i still gonna update my blog since i havent write any for ages(well, 1 week to be exact).
its been one lazy from head the ass(?) week for me.
next week school will be start.
ouh, im scared to death.
well, not the school.ok yes its the school, literally.
countdown in 3 days, i will be form 5 student!
OMG! im not ready for this! im freakin scared.
SPM? whats that? i dont know what SPM means.
apa tu? Saya Peminat Mario??
someone please tell me what Spm means?
i think im getting amnesia or short term memory loss.
haishh. teruk betol la. i hope i'll be ready for this year.
wait, i cant HOPE. i NEED to be ready fot this year.
do i want to be a loser for the rest of my life? hell no la.
like my previous post.
i will be diligent no matter what happen this year!
yes, rajin syaza, rajin!

aishhh..
dah la.
i just to keep you guys updated jer.
i dont think i can update my blog as often as i did last year.
but i will try my best ok?
bye!

xoxo,
syaza kamarudin

syaza and love?

2008-12-24T13:23:00.000-08:00

its 5.19 am and im still not even slightly sleepy.just watched christmas movie and its kinda good because there's mario lopez in it and tht girl from sabrina the teenage witch. ;)made my day actually, or i can say night?or morning because its technically morning?blehh im crapping. so, yeah. i wish there is love in my life.muahahaha.

syaza, ko jiwang apahal!
mana de aku jiwang! :(

nahh.. i dont think of any lovy dovy thing right now. i dont know. maybe im not interested or maybe im just a nahhh.. im straight, unfortunately.
kidding!

but that is true. i dont really think about couple or anything like that at this moment.
but i do have crushes on people.but thats just it. nothing more.
i looked at my friends and they said they LOVE their boyfriends with all their heart and soul..bla bla bla. yeah, we got it. they're your soul. without a part of them you'll die.yeah yeah yeah.

there are some of my friends asked me,

'' syaza, dah ada boyfriend belom?"

"boyfriend?nahh, x de pon.."

"tipulah, orang comel macam ko x kan tak de bf kot?"(NOTE THE SARCASISM IN THE SENTENCE)

"bukan x de nak tp sbb aku comel sngt la. tu la aku not interested."(again,NOTE THE SARCASISM!)

after a while, dorang dah malas nak layan aku. ;)

sometimes, i wonder jugak why the hell aku x de nafsu nak cinta2 nih.
lama2 fikir, baru ah aku tahu kenapa.
it maybe because im too FUSSY aka CHOOSY!

yup!that's gotta be the reason.

kalau boleh, my boyfriend needs to be tall, dark hair, pale skin, kaya, kaw sat genius, and good in english to be match with me who are short, dumpy, fat, gelap, miskin, agak pandai(lol), dan 'terer' in english.
senang cerita, SYAZA& British guy.

arent that match made in heaven? AS IF, SYAZA!
dont blame me, blame teenage girl hormones.they do most of the damages. ;)

so, what is the conclusion for all of this?
the conclusion is Syaza will be single for quite some time.

the end.

xoxo,
syaza kamarudin.

im nuts!

2008-12-22T08:53:00.000-08:00

i havent update my blog for a week i guess.

i dont know.

this time its not i'm busy or anything.

its just because i'm...LAZY

it looks like my passion, my enthusiam, my mood to write blog just fading away day by day.

that cant be happening. i need to post blog. that the only way i cant improve my essay writing or even to occupy my time.

OH NO! what am i gonna do? blehh, there's nothing i can do right?

let it be lah, i write blog when i want to.

some people might say...

"cheh, kata dah x der mood.syaza ni x payah tulis blog pon x pe.nothing interesting pon in her blogs.just waste of time"

"ala, syaza dah x der mood nak buat blog? x best la macam tuh."

big LOL.

WELL, i highly doubt that there even a person tht think my blog like wht i write above big LOL tuh. its either they hate my blog or they just didnt even care about it.

am i right?

lalala..

i want no body no body but you!
i want no body no body but you!
(meroyan sebentar.harap maaf)

anyway, new year is just around the junction!

speking of new year, harapan tahun ni tak tercapai pon.

i just dont have the enthusiasm to fulfill my resolution.

so, i wont have any resolution for year 2009.

do not, i repeat DO NOT ask me what my resolutions are.

(self tallking..again)
SYAZA; syaza, you are such a loser. u just sit ON your butt and do nothing.patutlah ko gemok tak kurus-kurus.

SYAZA2; =.=' ko diam la! biarlah aku gemok!aku panggil mak aku kang! ;(

blehhhhhh...

tell me tell me tell me

something i dont know,

something i dont know ,

something i dont know,

(keratan lirik lagu tell me something i dont know dari selena gomez)

silly

2008-12-17T06:17:00.000-08:00

assalamualaikum,

hello peeps!sorry its been a while since i post any blog.

quite busy with lots of things like tuition, help mom clean the house, meet friends etc.

another reason is my stremyx buat hal.

x boleh nak on9 bla bla bla .

this past weekend was a blast!

i had fun.

good friend of mine, zafira adila came here.

its been like 5 months or so since i saw her.

so, we actually had lots to catch up on and that 5 days werent enough.

but still, we used that time as joyly as we could.

one of things that we did were snapping pictures using my webcam!

god, we got like thousands of pictures of us doing silly things.

we just love being silly!

saturday sabtu

2008-12-06T00:44:00.000-08:00

its saturday.
semua aktiviti yang dah plan untuk hari ni semua tak jadi.aishh.
first, ingat nak pergi tengok twilight, tak jadi
then nak pergi rumah kawan birthday dier, pon x jadi juga
lepas tuh, ingat nak pergi mcdonald lagi haram jadah tak jadi.
conclusion die adalah; hari ni gile bosan la!
tak tahu nak buat apa.
nak cycling around house area tak ada mood pulak.
nak belajar...aha in my dreams kot.
malam sikit la baru belajar.
petang2 x de ilham nak study.
so, here i am.
in front of my boyfriend(laptop), picit2 die.tgk dier. tekan2.
aha..how pathetic am i?
dont even have one real human being boyfriend.lol

its friday survey!;D

2008-12-04T23:23:00.000-08:00

About Me
1. real name: syaza kamarudin
2. like it: yes
3. single or taken: single & unavailable
4. zodiac sign: leo
5. male or female: female
6. age: 16
7. height: 159cm
8. lucky number: 3
9. eye color: dark dark brown
10. hair color: black
11. long or short: short
12. marital status: -
13. are you a health freak: nope
14. height: already asked
15. do you have a crush on someone: yes i do. ;)
16. do you like yourself: ok lah
17. piercings: ears
18. tattoos: nope
19. righty or lefty: both but more to right
20. fav color: black pink
21. least fav color: grey
FIRSTS
22. first kiss: not yet.
23. first piercing: -
24. first best friend: najihah
25. first award: dapat no 1 dlm kelas.thats an award right?
26. first sport: cnt remember
27. first pet: goldfish
28. first vacation: beijing, china
29. first car: not yet
30. first crush: firdaus samad.ahaha. dah x crush dah pon

CURRENTLY
31. what time is it: its 3.43 pm
32. where are you: in my bedroom
33. wish: ada kat mcd
34. about to: sleep
35. listening to: generation-simple plan
36. waiting for: someone kot.lala
37. wearing: shirt and shorts
38. annoyed about: nothing
39. eating: nothing
40. drinking: x der la
FUTURE
41. want kids?: yes, someday
42. want to get married?: yes
43. careers in mind?: english lecturer. aha
44. dream car?: anything tht cost a fortune.lol

WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX
45. lips or eyes?: lips.
46. hugs or kisses: hugs
47. shorter or taller: taller
48. tan skinned or light: light specifically, PALE
49. romantic or spontaneous: spontaneous
50. dark or light hair: dark
51. built, fat, muscular, skinny, or normal: normal but with meat in his bone
52. hook up or relationship: relationship
53. similar to you or different: similar yet different
54. trouble maker or hesitant: a lil bit of both

HAVE YOU EVER
55. kissed a stranger: nope
56. drank bubbles: nope
57. ate a crayon: aha.kecik2 dulu
58. lost glasses/contacts: yes.
59. climbed up a tree: yes
60. broken someone's heart: nope as far as i know
61. been arrested: nope
62. turned someone down: yes ;(
63. cried when someone died:yes
64. liked a friend as more than a friend: oh yes. sighh

DO YOU BELIEVE IN
65. yourself: not really. mysellf can be really deceiving..
66. miracles: depends
67. ghosts: yes
68. love at first sight: not really.maybe becuse never experience it yet.who knows
69. santa clause: nope
70. heaven and hell: yes
71. kissing on the first date: aha.nope
72. God: yes, i believe in Allah.

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY
73. Is there one person you want to be with right now?
yes.

74. Who is it?
him

75. Do you kiss on the first date?
nope

76. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time?
nope

77. Last time you flossed?
err. longggggggg time ago.

78. Last time checked for STDs?
never. i'm still pure/virgin la.

79. Fart in public?
aha,penah la

80. Flirt with your friends boyfriend or girlfriend?
x penah kot

81. Cheat on a partner?
x penah

82. Whats under your bed?
skeletons of my enemies

83. Last time you cleaned your toilet?
its not my job to clean my toilet

84. Ever sprout hairs on your chin?
nope

85. Does the carpet match the curtains?
nope

86. Last kiss?
;)

87. Last booty call?
hah?

88. 7th text received?
ouh, x bole tulis.aha..
takutt

89. 4th missed call?
fira

90. Last comment received?
-

91. Sleep with a stuffed animal?
nop, but i know who does.aha

92. Last time you cried?
last week

93. Pee in pools?
aha.most of the time

94. Ever stolen something?
yes, didnt intend to

95. Ever drink milk from the carton?
yes

96. Mad at anyone?
not really

97. Ever rock a mullet?
ewwww.NO! geli douh.boys who hv mullets.freakiin cut it off

98. Last tuxedo worn?
never

99. Last video game played
supermario

i do accept advice from you

2008-12-03T07:42:00.000-08:00

i havent told you eh that i had just cut my hair 2 weeks ago.

aha..yup. i cut my hair. what style??

SUPERMARIO MUSHROOM HAIRCUT!

aha..nahh.
its a bangs.
ala katie holmes previous hair ..hee..
but the bangs still short.

i really like my hair now.
maybe because i just love my hair short.
long hair makes me uncomfortable.

well, one more thing.

there's one particular person told me that my blogs are crap?

i don't even know this creature!

let me define the crap she's talking about; unimportant, uneducational,really bad, clueless, uninteresting.

who are you want to judge me?

suka hati la aku nak buat blog!

aku susahkan ko ker?

u want me to write blogs about education? about add math? bahasa melayu ?physics?

how bout you do it yourself then since my blog is crap.

u told me that writing blog just wasting my time?

its my freakin time.not yours.

if you think your time is so precious, then why bother sending me messages telling me that my blog is crap?

fyi, i made this blog to express my feelings, my interest, my excitement .i didnt made this blog to brag about myself!

sudah2..

enough already.

ni baru waste of time tulis blog about you.sighh..

anyway, i do realise my blog is crap and i can take advice from anyone if they tell me nicely and politely. you can tell me what i should do to make my blog better and un-bad. i wont mad because i do want to change it for better. i accept advice and a piece of mind of yours as long as it acceptable.

penang oh penang

2008-11-30T05:06:00.000-08:00

hey hey hey!
hello peeps.
currently, at this moment, right now, etc etc....
i'm in penang.
straight from malaysia hotel.
lalalalala...

tadi pergi queensbay. nak shopping2.
tapi tade duit.lol.
so, inilah masanya menggunakan puppy face!hahaha..
pujuk2 mama, tak de reaction.
sah mmg x de can nak dapat duit la nih.ahaha..
then2..
mintak kat baba..
mula2 tak nak bagi then..
jeng jeng jeng!
ahaha..dapat 50.
pastu pergi la jln2 kat queensbay.
mama and baba duduk kat starbucks.minum2 kopi.
i went to forever 21 store.well, i thought there will be sales tp tade pon.
kat mango pown tade, esprit, topshop sumer no sales.(kata year end sales.)
baru nak carik dress. sighh.
then then in forever 21,ouh this one bag just caught my eyes!
warna silver!! god, so cute nak mati!
tp tp harga dier 119.00 RINGGIT MALAYSIA.
DAMN!
but wait! dier potong 119.00 tuh then tulis rm 55!
oh yes oh yes!
ahaha..
beli beli beli!
so, saya sudah ada beg baru. ;D

yeah!sorry it really sucks.
made it in a rush.
malas nak tulis ayat panjang2.aha..
so, bubye!

2008-11-27T08:38:00.000-08:00

aha.

oh yes,

im mrs edward cullen.lol (in my dream!)

once again, ouh edward i can be your bella. big LOL.

nahh, cant wait to watch twilight
fira tgk esok.

wah! jelous2.

ahaha.

have fun fira!

yeah, not in the mood for blogging.

just want to keep you updated that im not dead yet.
tata!

double dose of edward?count me in!rofl

took me by suprise

2008-11-25T01:04:00.000-08:00

gerard way already married?
wow, caught me by suprise.
i didnt even know that.aha
oh, well.

he's also will soon-to-be daddy.
there's goes my former 'lead singer' crush.
hope brendon urie still available.
lol.KIDDING.

anyway today, nothing evtravagant happen.
just normal stuffs.
i got into some comments fight in youtube.
i get mad when some ignorant people on youtube being such an ignorant...(?)
yeah. i can say i won the battle. lol

currently listening to; tell me something i dont know from selena gomez

perfectly unfortunate

2008-11-24T03:10:00.000-08:00

twilight keluar 27 nov.

cant wait!like seriously.

ahaha..

tp2 nak tgk dengan fira.

but she said she'll be in kl on tht date.

aish!!

fira, tgk dengan aku!;D

kalau x bole, tgk dengan my and aefa jer la. ;(

btw, i learnt new words/phrases today!;)

first, chuffed to bits- means that you are thrilled or excited about certain things

second, bo-donka-donk - means a very curvy womens behind.

lol. i just laughed when i heard the second word when i watched a clip from ellen degeneres when hugh laurie was her guest tv show.

speaking of hugh laurie, isnt he's the most charming guy ever? even he's already old but he is really good in what he's doing and i admire him as an actor. i love his sarcasam and enthusiasm in HOUSE. just perfect.

and one more thing,do you know that i FELL!

yes, i fell.how unfortunate and clumsy of me.

i was in a tennis court stadium in ipoh.

why im doing there?

just read my previous blog.

anyway, my mom asked me to take mineral bottle from the car.

so, i have to walk all the way to the car park which its outside the stadium.

while i was listening to mysic i didnt realise there was a big freakin stone in front of me.

so, i just ran into it and fell.

now i have lots of cuts and bruises on my arms and hands and knees.

it will leave strech marks!

bengap bengap!

lucky for me, no one saw me fell!

fuish!thank god.

bad thing is, i cried in front of my parents friends.

aha.animated sungguh.

currently, listening to untouched by the veronicas

2008-11-21T05:16:00.000-08:00

AT LAST!!!!!!

esok pergi ipoh. baba ada tennis tournament there. akhirnya tak adalah terperap jer dekat rumah doing nothing. ouh, teramat gembira tak terkira. bole la snap2 gambar guna camera.(obviously, takkan guna petai.) anyway. esok kene bangun pagi. 7 dah kene bertolak. sampai court tengok baba main, sembang2 with my mom, snap2 pictures, listen to my mp3....

And speaking of mp3. my bloody earphone rosak!baru beli like 5 month ago! dah la mahal! bengap!kene beli baru! earphone tu dah la sangt comfortable bile pakai. kene pergi sony store beli baru..aishh..mana nak carik duit nih?? kene bodek baba lagi nih!

i made choc chip cookies just now. and it taste good than what i expected.not to brag but i think i made good choc chip.hee.

one more thing, im inlove with this one particular song AGAIN. yup its from brian mcfadden and delta goodrem called almost here. i like this song like 2 years ago then i kinda over it.but after i hear it again 3 days ago, i just keep tht song out of my head! its like im addicted to that song!aishhh..ahaha. oklah!thats all! maybe i wont be able to update my blog till next monday.

so, have a great weekend you guys! love you all!

twlight all the way!

2008-11-20T04:38:00.000-08:00

baru half way through baca TWILIGHT.

(yes, i know i know.u guys dah baca i belom.big deal)

and iVE already got goosebumps like 3 times or so.

the first i really like when edward said

"what if im not a superhero.what if im the bad guy?"

OMG! im gonna faint!

the second one the scene when edward(again) said

"it was very...hard-you can't imagine how hard-for me to simply take you away, and then leave them...alive"

bla bla bla.

yeah.

cant wait for the movie. im counting the days. fira pon tgh tunggu.aha..
save your money for 2 twilght tickets fira. lalala

so, yeah that is all.

just sharing my excitement with you guys.

once again,

OH ROBERT PATTISON, WHY YOU HAVE TO BE SOOO HOT!

p/s; now i need to buy their 2nd, 3rd and 4th books. need lots of $$$. sighh.

C to the R to the U to the S to the H!

2008-11-18T06:59:00.000-08:00

saya meng-crush pada someone lagi!

aha. malu2.

bodoh la.

malas betol crush2 nih.

buat angau jer..lalala

die comel kot.

ahaha.

he used to be my crush few months back.

then dah lupa dier sebab x penah jumpa lagi dah after english debate dulu.

then harituh terserempak dengan dier balik.

bodo bodo.

why?why? aishhhhhh.

once again. i think its just a lil crush.

no harm at all.

2 3 minggu lagi hilang la kot crush crush ni.

besides, no time for this thing at all.

spm babe! spm next freakin year.

syaza; gosh syaza, since when u become such a nerd?

syazajuga; since EVER? duhh.

currently listening; james morrison-you give me something

sunday morning

2008-11-16T01:06:00.000-08:00

sunday morning.
yeah, im blogging and i didnt mandi yet.
ala.mandi lambat sikit apa salahnyer.
bukan selalu.
cuti baru 2 hari and i started to feel bore.
how am i supposed to survive for another 1 and a half month?
adoii.
syaza, ko mmg loser la.(sorry i talk to myself a lot)
already miss my friends.
fira, khirtham, put, sheryna, etc etc etc.
time fly fast when we want them to stop ticking and vice versa.

so now, every evening, to waste my precious time i will cycling around my taman 2 or 3 times with my earphone stuck in my ears . yes peeps. EVERY EVENING.
gile boring punya pasal.
and it seems that i kinda enjoy cycling alone without anyone bothers about me.
it keeps my mind off the fuckin things that i hate too.

so, yeah. anyone duduk area taman desa bayu.
come and join me!
it think its okay to have a company once in a while.

4 SCIENCE 1 (2008)

2008-11-15T05:20:00.000-08:00

(we're the naughty yet nice yet lazy yet brainy people, peeps!)

tht picture above was taken on the last day of school (14/11/08) (credits to fira)

ouh, just the best.

dont know how to describe the feelings on tht day.

sad, happy, excited, missed, annoyed.

ahaha. yup.

what i know, i love them so freakin much.

they're the best classmates ever since 2004.

see you guys next year!

& HAPPY HOLIDAY!

in the mood for survey.

2008-11-14T05:24:00.000-08:00

--> Spell your name without vowels: syz

--> What is the date 2 days after your birthday?: not telling

--> How many pairs of jeans do you own?:10+

--> How many are designer?: 4-5

--> What color do you wear most?: black

--> Least favorite color?: yellow

--> Last song heard on the radio?: x ingat

--> What's for dinner tonite?:ayam masak kicap

--> Are you happy with your life right now?: blehh

--> Tell me a secret about one of your siblings: my sister ...really pretty!

--> Anyone ever said you resemble a celebrity?: nope

--> Who did you last call on your cell phone?: isa

--> Do you own a..

- PS2?:nope

- XBOX 360?:nope

- PSP?:nope

- SIDEKICK?: nope

- DIGITAL CAMERA?:yup

--> In what state or country do you want to go to school after highschool?: england maybe?

--> Do you shop at stores like Hollister, Abercrombie & Fitch, American Eagle, or Aeropostale?:yes, if we have them here.

--> How do you make money?: "mama nak duit? (with puppy face)"

--> Last thing you bought over 50 dollars?: my jeans

--> How's the weather?: it's rained just now

--> Are you missing someone right now?: not really

--> What chores do you have around the house: clean my own bedroom

--> Finish this sentence. I wish: i was good in everything. sigh..

--> One word to describe you:spoiled

--> Favorite pair of shoes:my walt disney sneakers

--> Do you own big sunglasses? ouh yes. ;D

--> Do you find yourself attractive?: depends

--> What would you rather be doing right now?: watch andy murray lose to roger federer

--> What should you be doing right now?: same as above

--> Have you kissed your boyfriend/girlfriend lately?: nope.dont hv one

--> Last IM you recieved?: none

--> Who did you hug today?: ramai.

--> What are you going to do now?: im going to eat dinner now

diligent? next year(or month) i swear!

2008-11-12T23:20:00.000-08:00

listening to; goodnight and goodbye(jonas brothers)

ok, as i expected my full exam results are bad. real bad.

its actually beyond bad.

but nasi dah jadi bubur.

you cant change anything.

no use to cry over it right?

so, i determine myself to be much much more diligent person next year.

and thats not cakap kosong at all.

next year i'll sit for spm.

its hell of a big thing.

no more play2 like this year.

enough of what ive already did this year.

the more responsible syaza said to less responsible syaza:
syaza, better study or i'll kick your ass masuk longkang!

the less responsible syaza replied:
yes, MOM! sigh..

just sharing my happy mood

2008-11-11T22:07:00.000-08:00

(this is the face of a happy girl with no particular reasons for her OTT happiness)

one overly happy bitch right here.

dont even know why. but just in happy mood.

and nothing will ruin my happy time right now.

not even my mom nags about my freakin results.

not a single thing.

lalala.

oh, happy mood.

you come and go.

blehh.

syaza, shut up!

tata!

low self esteem?? i think so

2008-11-11T07:28:00.000-08:00

currently; eating fries and listening to the academy is..., about a girl

today, i got my english exam paper.

and you know what?

it sucks! fuckin sucks. i mean real sucks la..

if there's another word that can replace sucks in higher grade of suckness, i will use that word.i will use that word as many as possible to indicate how suck i am!

i mean okay, i maybe can get atleast A2 and A1 really not what i even consider to get.

but then again. i just got B3. yeah babes, B3. freakin 71%.

how am i supposed to be an english teacher if my english not even reach to A2 standard?

thats really pathetic of me. lately, ive been reconsidered of even be an english teacher. i think i want to change my ambition.

but... oh god, i dont know.

english has been my interst since i was little.

i thought i was good in english but now, i've been think about it lately that maybe i'm not as good as i think i am. but, screw it la! i still have a year to improve my english!

bla bla bla.. if i still sucks in english, there's still many options i can choose. maths teacher maybe? some people sais that maths teacher are the sexiest one!LOL

i hate this feelings

2008-11-10T06:16:00.000-08:00

quite stressful this past few days.

lots of things happened that i dont want it to happen.

ouh, im emoing again.

i hate when i become this fuckin sad and depressed.

bla bla bla.

well, i went to see this doctor again because of my illness which im not gonna tell.

and the result didnt look that good.

im not fully recover yet.

and then school problem pula.

there's some unexpected problem occur in school.

the situation aint pretty at all.

only my classmates know what actually happened.

ouh, im not gonna write too much about it because everytime i think about it,

i swear im gonna cry.

this is the first time i felt regretion have control each part of me.

ouh, how i wish i could turn back time.

aish..

no happy mood right now.

bla bla bla.

yeah.

bye.

i have a minor problem peeps

2008-11-08T07:52:00.000-08:00

arghh!screw you bloody blogspot!
ok, i have minor problem with this freakin blog.
it seems that i cant save the link list.
i go to layout
then push the add a gadget button
then click on link list
put the url and name .
then bila tekan save
die X BOLEH!
dah cuba & cuba & cuba but still i cant fuckin save it!!
bodoh.
is it me or this website yang ada problem.
gosh! what to do???
ahaha,..
anyone!
if someone knows what i did wrong tell me!
thanks.

p/s; real blog coming soon!

WHAT A SUNDAY MORNING I TELL YOU

2008-11-01T20:31:00.000-07:00

i woke up 7.00 in the morning today and its sunday!its one hell of a record for me. oh yes.lol. i woke this early so i can accompanied my mom to pasar tani. its my first time went to pasar tani. ;) its not that bad actually. i thought pasar tani would be very dirty and smelly with all the meat from the butcher, fish from all sizes. but looks like i was freakin wrong. it seems nice. well, not like shopping complex or anything(obviously), but its clean. no smell of anything unpleasent. but one thing, i wont go to that pasar tani again. there are lots of mothers and teacher there.oh yes.aha. today i bumped to cikgu rusina, my physics teacher.she's really popular for her unbelievebly sarcasism and im like OMG!! where to run? where? she's in front towards me and my mom is behind me. so, im stuck! what a nightmare. its not like i dont want to see her but not with my condition at that time. she always see me in tudung and baju kurung sekolah. then suddenly she will see me in shorts, short sleeves tshirt, x der tudung, with black nail polish. what she will think about me. i've always been a good student(not the sulker one, mind you) in front of her. and i want to keep it that way (i guess). she's getting near and near me. i was about to greet her then she just walk straight besides me. like not even a single slightest GLARE. i was froze for a second. she didnt see me? seriosly, she didnt saw me?OK. SHE DIDNT SAW ME!. thats a good news right. aha. and im like oh yeah oh yeah! im not noticable! im not noticable??

WAIT! that cant be right. im unnoticable!thats not a good thing. am i always unnoticable by other people? x boleh jadi! i want people to notice me! or maybe she just didnt recognised me. yeah maybe that after all, like i said. i didnt wear tudung at that time. yeah, MAYBE.ok, i do think im exagerate a lil bit just noW, sorry! but still, im noticable! im not invisible. i want people to take notice of me. but i do sometimes think that i live by someone else shadow. but that's a total different story. might write about it another time.. thats all peeps! bye bye darlings!

emo'ing for a minute..or two

2008-11-01T03:22:00.000-07:00

ANGER is an ugly thing. not just ugly but freakin scary too.

people get angry when someone makes them angry

but how if suddenly it come to you without any reasonable explanation.

like what im going through right now.

i feel like want to punching someone without any particular reasons.

suddenly it hits me.

is this the effect of holding your grudge towards someone you hate for a long period of time?

the hatred that been in your damn body and never express it to anyone?

i am a person that keep things to myself.

i dont tell anyone about my problem except to whom i really trust.

even so, i dont tell tht person all of it.

just minor of what i feel.

i dont think that telling your problem will fix anything.

thats what my point of view.

and now,

i feel like all of this

already eating and chewing me alive!

i try to be the happiest dummy you would ever meet.

thats just me.

outside you'll find me very easy to talk to and will not show her sour face.

when im alone, i tend to entertain myself by daydreaming to keep my self from thinking other things.

sometimes i cry just because 'just because'.

oh, im getting insane!

should i consult a shrink?

should i?

i will still be me, the 'keep to herself' person.

so, the one who knows me. dont be shock if suddenly i explode

coz sooner or later i will.

im just like a time bomb machine.

and its look like im running out of time.

p/s; dont worry guys. even if i explode. it will be 1 in 16 years time.

it dont come easily. ;)

photoshop will make you crave for more!

2008-10-31T08:45:00.000-07:00

yes photoshop. when u getting good at it..

it becomes your drug.. oh yes trust me.

when your not good at it, you dont even bother bout it

but when your getting used to it and getting

BETTER AND BETTER

its will be your addiction.

i cant say that i'm a photoshop badass because i am not.

but i can consider myself as good among the suckers.

yes, like that.

but i have got to learn lots more things.

i can say that ive just learned like not even quarter than waht adobe photoshop cs provide .

and oh yes, im just using adobe photoshop cs.

not cs2 or cs3.

cs1 are easiest to manage and understand.

easy to understand pun took me about 5 months to cope with it..

SHUT UP! i know la im a slow learner.

yeah yeah yeah.

and u know what?

my final exam finally over!

oh yes!

freedom!(yeah right!lol)

because of that i dont have to worry my mom nag me for sleeping late.

i can do whatever i want!(well, not whatever)

ouh! nak ponteng sekolah la !

tido kat rumah much much better than pergi sekolah..wahahaha

oklah!thats all y'll!

and one more thing!i freakinly cant wait for twilight to come out!

ouh robert pattison!

why do you hve to be so hot?

aha..ok..emough with this crap.

bye2.

currently listening to ; last request by paulo nutini

get to know me better.

2008-10-27T09:59:00.000-07:00

Name: syaza kamarudin

.Sister/s:1

.brother/s:1

.Shoe size:7

.What are you wearing right now?; shirt and shorts

.Where do you live? manjung, perak

Favorite Number: 7

Favorite Drinks:milkshake shake shake shake shake it

Favorite Months: august

Favorite Breakfast:toast or nasi lemak

.***********Have You Ever***********

Been on a plane: yes

.Been in a bath tub: Yeah

Swam in the ocean:yup

Fallen asleep in school:nope

Broken someone's heart:Nope

Fallen out on your chair:Yes

Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call:Nope

Saved e-mails:Yeah! oh yes! lol

..***********What is************

Your room like:pink, freakin messy, and messy also messy and oh i forgot, messy.lol

.What is the last thing you ate?nasi with sotong masak hitam

-------------Ever Had-------------

Chicken pox:Yupp

.Sore throat:Yea

.Broken nose:no! what? u think im michael jackson ker?lol

..-----------Do You-----------

Believe in love at first sight?not really

.Like picnics? sure

.----------Who----------

.Who was the last person you sang with? alone

.Who last made you smile? kickthepj videos

Who did you last yell at?no one.i dont yell

----------Final Questions-------------.

What are you listening to right now? bunyik air conditioner

.What did you do today?mkn dan tidur and tgk tv

Hate someone in your family? no, just cnt stand them but i still love them!

Diamond or pearl?Diamond all the way

Are you the Eldest? no

Indoors or outdoors? indoors

.-------Today did you-----------.

1.Talk to someone you like? nope

2.Kiss anyone ? tidak juga

3.Get sick? yes. ada tembel kat mata. screw you tembel!

5.Talked to an ex: dont hv one to begin with

6.Miss someone: not really

----------Last person who----------.

7.You talked to on the phone? sheryna

.----------Random--------------

.21.Have a crush on someone?Yes

.22.What books are you reading right now? ada lah!

23.Best feeling in the world:satisfy

24.Future kids names? somthing tht nice and deff long. hee

.25.Do you Sleep with stuffed animals?no! kids and some spoiled brats tido with it

26.What's under your bed? my boyfriend. lol

27.Favorite locations:mdonald and my room

29.Danced a slow dance with someone you didn't even like? no

..32.Who do you really hate?some particular person! i hate them but still they pretend to be nice to me! fuck them.

35.Ever liked someone you didn't have a chance with?yes

36.You lonely right now?not really

perez oh hilton

2008-10-27T09:02:00.000-07:00

oh perez hilton. what damaged did you did to me. what did you did(?) to me? i'm crazy bout you.. well not you just your website but still. you make me CRAVE for freakin more! your sarcasism just makes my brains rotate 180 degrees. oh yes perez oh yes. the way you called miley 'the teen slut' just made my day more happy than ever. the way you say about vanessa hudgen just make me love you(your site) even more! you just know what to say. even sometimes i think u OTT but still made my day. oh perez, thank god that ur gay. coz if not i will definitely freakin f**k you!!(NOT!). lol.. still, thank you perez for making that website and keep on rocking! im gonna be your follower as long as you dishing miley and vanessa and stay with your sarcastic attitude!

p/s; dont kill me for writing this blog. its just for fun!;D

http://www.perezhilton.com

i just love bein kid again. fira my bestie!

2008-10-22T05:29:00.000-07:00

blehh...
today i had english exam and urrrghhhh! its freakin hard! i thought i would be piece of cake as the teacher who made the exam is the nicest teacher on earth, but no!it was flippin difficult..syaza syaza, how eh you want to be an english teachr if your english sucks like vaccuum??aiyo... yeah..you read right.. my ambition would be becoming an english teacher.. ironic isnt it? your english sucks but cita2 nak jadi english teacher..ahaha.. but screw you! i dont care.. i still wants to be an eng teacher no matter what. ok2 enough of this crap..let me tell you about yesterday.. my parents werent home yesterday so as nice as i am i went out with fira to mcdonald..haha..oh yes.. im really nice took advantage keluar without my moms permission.;) oh well.hee . back to the story..so yeah.. and who might live in manjung you deff know that rain pour cat and dog last night.. crazy heavily. at first fira and i just want to cancelled our plan to mcd.. but, as we were craving for mcd so badly. we just stick to our first plan. so i took 2 umbrellas and here we come mcd!oh yeah.. we went to mcd WALKING(yes, walking ladies, not cycling or naik motor. we actually walk to mcdonald). and hell it was soo much fun!i'd never walk to somewhere that is quite far from my home without using any transport apatah lagi waktu hujan2!sangt best!its really unforgettable. so, yeah. after arrived in mcd. we just straight to the counter and order our meal.. mine would be spicy chicken mdeluxe, my all time favourite food in mcd and zafira ordered ayam goreng mcd. then we just talk and talk chat and chat, gossip and gossip. its been real fun. i really love talk to fira because we are like sisters. we share almost all the interests. i can talk with her for hours and never get bored.. ouh.. she's like my other half. i dont know what i would do without tht girl named nurul zafirah binti roslim. i might die.oh yes.. ok2 back to the story..again. yeah we chat2 keeping up with each others stories and laugh about it. we were like making that mcd like our own house..seriously. we laugh like real loud but no one noticed because no one in there actually. its just us and 2 and 3 couples. we talk and tallk some more just waited for the rain to stop but looks ike its getting worse.. suddenly i looked at my watch and its already 6 pm! we;ve been in there for 3 hours! wow, time do fly fast. at that point, we dont care about the freakin rain anymore,.. kitorang redah jer..peduli apa..aha..then half through to my home, something quite notty popped in my mind. i said to fira
"fira2, jom main hujan!" and so we closed our umbrellas and play in the rain!;D it felt so good! feelin like a child again. oh how ive already miss that time.

so, fira! jom pergi mcd waktu hujan2 lagi oke? kite duduk kat mcd dari pagi sampai petang pulak nanti!! it wouls so much fun!

damn you additional mathematics!

2008-10-19T22:38:00.000-07:00

hi, todays monday. oh what a day! i dont really like monday. sangat malas. the fisrt day of school of a week. how lazy can u get eh? but i have to go jugak today. add math exam baru jer habis. gosh! was tht exam real hard or im just plain stupid . its either both. lol. so yeah. exam was quite hard. i dont expect that i will get anywhere near A1 but A2 is somewhat i think i will get. ;) insyaallah. i'm fasting today.. thank god rain are pouring. tak de lah rasa penat sangat. sejuk jer... kalau tidur mmg sangt sedap.huhu.. yeah.. i dont feel like revising anything today.
tomorrow's exams are bahasa melayu paper 1 &2. so, no sweat..there's nothing to revise about. right now, im just try to figure out how to use this blog site thingy.. need more to leard i think. hope i will catch up fast... ok!thats all i think.. need to sleep. i slept 4 am this morning and woke up at 6.30 am! and i guarantee i will be sleeping like bears after exams done.trust me i will.aha.. ouh, lack of sleep does make you feel like a zombie with the baggy eyes and everything.
wait!didnt i just said i need to sleep..so, that is all for now.. tht pink comfy luxurios pretty bed is calling me...daaa!

introduction to something you call boredom

2008-10-19T10:22:00.000-07:00

WELCOME TO SYAZAFALL'S BLOGSPOT PEOPLE!

hey. well let see. what should i do right now? am i supposed to intro myself or just get to the blog thingy. oh god!im merepek-ing.lol ok, for my first blog, let me introduce myself.

name; syaza
age; currently 16 (2008)
country; malaysia
state; perak
interest; i have no idea

ok.... i think this this 'let me tell you about me' thing is BORING! so, yeah. i should stop.
how bout i tell you why i registered in this blog site. frankly, i dont even know. i read other people's blog and i found it quite intersting.its fun! so,(sorry, i used lots 'so' words.cant help it) 15 minutes ago, i brave myself(yeah right) and registered in here. and now i have a blog site.how EXCITING!(not). well, i dont care if there's no one would even wants to read my blog..
i personally would post blog just to stay sane and keep my minds from other thing. i do also think that posting blogs would help me express myself because trust me. i suck in expressin myself. so, yeah. im run out of words to write. see! not even close to 100 words i lost idea to write.. well done syaza. lol. i do talk rubbish. sangat suka cakap merepek. i talk about unimportant things and thats what all my blogs ganna fill with.

so, (again!) thats all. do you know that i actually supposed to revise add math for my exam tomorrow? yeah that is what i SHOULD do, but NO, i do blog instead. very impressive.aha. well, that is all. i will hardest as i can to write a blog everyday. i will still write even no ones read it. ;)
so, (=.=') yah.. i should stop this instant. bye!